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Ok.. I just don't know how to word this to a 3 year old but I need to talk to him about it...

How do you teach them about "bad touch" ? We've told him not to let anyone make him feel uncomfortable and not to let anyone "play" with his private parts but being 3-1/2, we are still working on wiping himself and washing himself.. he asked, Can "Sally" ( daycare provider ) not take me to the bathroom when I have to go? What about Grandma ? I explain its not while he is going to the bathroom but any other time... His response " so mommy and daddy can't give me a bath anymore" lol.. I can't quite figure how to word this for him .. can someone give me advice please?


Asked by maxsmom11807 at 11:02 AM on Apr. 28, 2011 in General Parenting

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Answers (6)
  • It is so unfortunate that we have to deal with these situations at these ages. My dd was four when we had to deal with it. It was a horrible situation. I would just pick "safe" people and tell him these people are okay. No one else is. Because for us it was my 14 year old nephew.

    Answer by Shaken1976 at 11:29 AM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • I would just say someone can only touch his privates when they are helping clean him or take care of him. When he gets older you can explain it further.

    Answer by ria7 at 11:06 AM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • I just told DS,, when you need to use the bathroom, of course,, and name the people who could help him, it is okay for you to touch yourself, but Mommy. Daddy or Grandma will wash you when you get a bath,,if anyone asks to touch you or let the "SEE" it, yell NO, and tell me, daycare lady, daddy,,anyway,, I must have driven this point home, we went to the doctor the other day,,(he had a suspected bladder infection) the doctor says I need to look at your penis,, and he yelled NO! I said honey this is the doctor and it is okay,, YOU always have the best questions about your little one,,hope you got the daycare thing worked out :)!

    Answer by kimigogo at 11:07 AM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • My son is 4, I give him a bath but i showed him how to wash his private areas by himself and tell him he is a big boy when he does it and after he uses the potty i give him toilet paper and help him a little but as far as teaching him the other thing i tell him thats his private parts and if anyone touches his private parts to tell mommy or daddy hes 4 so i dont kno if he understands but kids there age will more then likely tell you if something like that were to happen

    Answer by HaydensMommy4 at 11:13 AM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • My sons daycare uses the Happy Bear program to teach the children about good touch/bad touch. Happy Bear visits and they provide each child with a coloring book that depicts different situations where touch is good and bad. It is simple and straight-forward and perfect for 3-5 year olds. You might check with your local library to see if they have any childrens books that are like that. I tried to find a link for the Happy Bear program online but the only ones I could find only sell the coloring books in bulk.

    Answer by Aleasha at 11:20 AM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • Use two dolls to illustrate this for him.

    Answer by older at 11:06 AM on Apr. 28, 2011