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Sd age turning 13 wants to stay at dad's says no

ok we live 3 1/2 mins from bm's house. sd and bm fight like cats and dogs ( im sure its the age ) sd has made it known she wants to stay here and that bm will not allow it. so today sd shows up at the door crying saying she wants to stay here..her and mom got into it again. i say its fine call dh to have him call bm to tell her she is here and its ok, mins later bm pulls in fights with sd and litarrly pulls sd out of house kicking and screaming. what are we to do? what are our rights? well dh's rights?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 5:01 PM on Apr. 28, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (14)
  • Oh man she should be old enough to chose take BM to court!!!

    Answer by kylansmommy09 at 5:06 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • I wish, as a teen, I would have been given the opportunity to get some space from my mother. The fact that mom is coming over and "literally pulling her out of there kicking and screaming" denotes that this isn't just a bratty 13 year old (they all are, to some degree), but that mom is unequipped to properly parent her at this time and needs to get HER head on straight.

    It depends on the state in which you live. In some states, teens can pick after a certain age where they would like to live and in other states, they cannot pick until they are no longer minors. Where do you live? In any event, you can petition a judge to get custody, and your SD can make a statement of preference that the judge WILL weigh, no matter what state. It's just a matter of how simple this process will be, depending on the state.

    Answer by Ataemommy at 5:06 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • we live in NEWHAMPSHIRE.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 5:25 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • well normally at age 11 12 they have the right to speak in court but she needs to understand once she lives with you it wont be a get away there anymore you guys have rules too alot of kids think grass is greener on other side then they start the go back and forth shit

    Answer by flipper4u21 at 8:03 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • What are the rules at both houses? Does Dad not have any and Mom has a lot? If she just doesn't want rules to follow, then I'd be hesitant to let her stay.....

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:07 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • Revisit the custody agreement and get your stepdaughter a Guardian ad Litem or a Court Appointed Special Advocate (CASA). Either one is a court representative that is out for this girls' best interestes, not y'all and not her bio mom. I think she is old enough, in the eyes of the courts, to say who she'd rather live with.


    Answer by Rosehawk at 8:14 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • Speak to an attorney.

    Answer by KTMOM at 1:01 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • Its time to go to court and let her tell the judge what she wants to do.

    Answer by mommythree0508 at 5:06 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • Take bm to court!

    Answer by JHanc968 at 9:22 PM on May. 10, 2011

  • can dh talk to her

    Answer by mommyof3-2008 at 10:56 AM on May. 18, 2011

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