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4 Bumps

My transgender son wants to have a quinceanera (like a sweet 16 party)!!!

I've posted before about my son's being transgender and wearing girls clothes, but now I'm completely at a loss. He's turning 15 this summer and cried when I told him that he can't have a quincenaera (both his sisters had one). I feel horrible but I dont know what to do. There's no way I'm inviting family and friends over to see him dressed up like that. I allow him to do it at home and a few of his friends know he's transgendered, but this seems too far. He hasn't spoken to me for days. What do I do here? I don't think its wrong for him to be transgendered, and I try to support him in being himself, but this is crazy, right?

***Sorry I didn't explain what a quinceanera is -- I tried to post a link but can't.  Just google it.


Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 5:55 PM on Apr. 28, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Answers (19)
  • awwww
    I'd give him his party.

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 6:05 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • I am at a loss, I hope you find an answer. I don't think I would handle that very well.

    Answer by Melbornj at 6:10 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • The best thing you can do as a parent is be supportive. If it were my son, I'd let him have the party. Does the rest of the family know that he's transgender? If there's a way to sit down and talk to family members and explain the situation, I'd do that. Let them know that if they're not comfortable with the situation, they don't have to come, but you and your son would be very happy if they came out and showed their support. That being said, this is only my opinion, and not necessarily right. You do what you feel is best for everyone.

    Answer by Eviesmommy at 6:18 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • You are assuming that everyone knows what a "quiceanera" is,right? I don't know what it is.
    But I don't understand any of this question anyway.He s your son and wants a "quinceanera".,..why shouldn't he?
    ARe you sure about his gender issues?

    Answer by minnesotanice at 6:18 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • I think it's great you allow him to be himself, but I'm not sure what I would do given the situation. I can't see family being as supportive as you - I don't think I would allow it just to spare him the pain of ridicule by loved ones.

    Answer by Ginger0104 at 6:19 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • Be supportive...

    Answer by anayasmommy21 at 6:22 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • well first i dont know what that is but if you say you support him then it should be 100 % and if that means people knowing then so be it and if your worried about people finding out and ridiculing him well i dont see it changing there going to anyway so let it happen while you are there for him

    Answer by flipper4u21 at 7:59 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • To those wondering what a quinceanera is: It's a party, traditionally given to girls of 15. It's a Hispanic/ Latin American tradition. And usually marks the transition from childhood into young womanhood. It's a lot like the American tradition of a sweet 16 party.

    Answer by Eviesmommy at 8:12 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • ok here's a link that explains a little -- I couldn't paste the wikipedia article for some reason

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 8:37 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • just aloud him to have his party with friends

    Answer by sassy21176 at 12:11 PM on May. 1, 2011

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