Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Men and house chores

do you feel if the man works and you dont they dont have to do anything around the house? for the most part i do feel that way.i do all the running cooking cleaning whatever i do it all but once in awhile i cant be around for dinner time or bedtime for the kids.like maybe once every couple months or even longer and my so still wont cook dinner deal with homework or bedtime or nothing do you agree he shouldnt have to.

Answer Question
 
flipper4u21

Asked by flipper4u21 at 8:38 PM on Apr. 28, 2011 in Relationships

Level 20 (9,422 Credits)
Answers (12)
  • You have to do what is best for your own relationship... and you both have to agree.

    But in general I dont understand why a sahm would expect her husband to come home and do MORE work. She is there ALL day... how hard is it to keep house????


    btw... I AM a sahm of 3 and have been for 16+ years.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:40 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • I kind of agree....his job is to go to work and bring home the bacon...my "job" is to clean the house and cook....don't get me wrong I love it when he decides to help out but I don't feel like he should be "required" to......I do expect for him to make dinner and do homework, bedtime ect if I'm not there for whatever reason though...I don't want to come home to the children starving and nothing done.
    Lucky209

    Answer by Lucky209 at 8:42 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • i think house chores no i got it our kids yes. I didnt make our kids by myself he can give baths help with homework and put them to bed sometimes.
    whitenena

    Answer by whitenena at 8:46 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • My husband is amazing. I do everything around here. He works all day and I stay home. My job is taking care of our home. He will still walk in and jump right in. I have only had to ask for his help one time. I was sick but he did not realize how bad I was feeling.

    He tore into a friend of ours too. She has surgery and had been down for a few days due to recovery. I cooked dinner for them. We went over and her house was a disaster zone. Her husband had done nothing. I immediately began to clean. My husband told him to be a man and do things around the house while she was down. The guy felt awful and helped me finish cleaning. I went over there everyday after that and he was doing what he should have been. I would just cook.

    Yeah I am lucky.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 8:51 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • I am asahm and dh works. When he gets home I don't expect him to do anything because he has been working all day. The only thing I do ask of him is to do the litter box for right now, but ONLY because I am pregnant and can't do it right now other than that I don't ask anything I even have dinner made and his plate made at the table and a glass of tea sitting waiting for him so all he has to do is sit down and eat. Although he does help me, but I don't ask him to he just does it.
    mommy5409

    Answer by mommy5409 at 8:52 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • Only things I ask of my hub are outside chores (because he knows I get sick very easy in the heat, and I cannot handle winter cold like he can) and to cook for me on the weekends (if you could only taste...he's a MUCH better cook than I am!).

    My kids are old enough now they help out around the house with cleaning.
    hopeandglory53

    Answer by hopeandglory53 at 8:59 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • My husband works outside the home and I am a SAHM of 5 kids. He helps me when he gets home with whatever needs to be done. We've both been working all day long, not just him. He gets to go out to lunch everyday with his coworkers that I don't get - there are perks to both of our jobs. Don't get me wrong, I'd never want to not be a SAHM but I wouldn't be married to a man that came home and sat on his butt while I was running around taking care of the kids, cooking, cleaning, etc.
    missanc

    Answer by missanc at 9:04 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • In general, there is no right answer. I was a sahm for over 6 years, but it was forced upon me due to my health. Due to the same health, I really struggled to stay on top of the housework. So DH did well over half the housework - but he also doesn't have a typical 9-5 job, there are many days he's home all day with "nothing better to do". He's never had a problem doing housework, I've never had to ask or demand it of him, he just does what needs doing (I think it helped that he lived on his own for 7 or 8 years before we met, had his own house). Even though I've gone back to work (only 3-4 hours a day) and he actually does half my job for me sometimes, he still does the same amount of housework. It's just what works for us. He's just better & faster at some things and knows it, so he does it. He's definitely a superman when it comes to life with me.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:52 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • first anon did you not read what i wrote i do feel its my responsibility unless for some reason i cant and then like lucky said when i cant do it dont let my kids starve and just because he works outside of house and i dont doesnt mean im a single parent. im talking about like one day i had a minor surgery and had to drive myself and 2 yr old home afterwards then get him and groceries out of vehicle and come in put them away and cook dinner and deal with kids because he wanted to play with speakers in car and even if he wasnt. hed be sitting on couch doing nothing by the way surgery was unexpected other wise i would have made other arrangements because i know he wont help
    flipper4u21

    Comment by flipper4u21 (original poster) at 10:50 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

  • I agree to a certain extent, I always have the house clean, dinner prepared, and the kids taken care of, but I feel like he can at least take out the trash and clean up after himself (taking his plate to the sink, throwing away trash, putting dirty clothes in the hamper)...he sometimes doesn't see it the same way though, and me being pregnant, I'm getting a little tired, lol.
    kyuteangl88

    Answer by kyuteangl88 at 11:04 PM on Apr. 28, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN