Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

5 year old girl insistent that she's a boy

What can I do to lean her more towards girly things; just keep offering them? She's always been very tomboy-ish in the things she likes. Never been into princesses and pink things. I don't want her to think she's a boy when she absolutely is a girl. Where could this be coming from? I'm worried.


Asked by Anonymous at 12:24 AM on Apr. 30, 2011 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

This question is closed.
Answers (22)
  • She may or may not grow out of it, but either way I would just ask her why she thinks so. It may be something she wished or something she's reasoning in her mind. Like I used to believe that nickels and dimes were inside of a quarter and the cashier knew how to open it with his cash drawer. It was silly, but it made perfect sense to me.
    I'd just talk to her and allow her to talk to you and tell you why.

    Answer by CallMeAngie at 12:42 AM on Apr. 30, 2011

  • Here are a few sites that may help :) good luck..and PLEASE still love your child if this is what she turns out to push her to be something she feels she mentally not you could lose her completely!

    Answer by SweetPoison at 1:09 AM on Apr. 30, 2011

  • If you push her, she will push back harder. Just chill. She can be a tomboy, that isn't going to go down in a bad way. Does she actually insist that she is a boy? If so, I still wouldn't worry-when I was 4 I thought that all girls grew dicks when they turned 8. No big deal, I grew out of it and she will too.

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 12:26 AM on Apr. 30, 2011

  • She will (at least once a week) tell me she's a boy, and then I immediately say "No, you're a girl just like mommy and sister". I was a huge tomboy too, but I never thought I was actually a boy. And I had two brothers extremely close in age where as she has none.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:28 AM on Apr. 30, 2011

  • I was like that too. I had two older brothers. and never really like girl things. whatever my brothers did, i did. paint ball, dirt bike, tae kwon do. I grew out of it. I'm still a tom boy but i do girly things now too

    Answer by K-Chan at 12:30 AM on Apr. 30, 2011

  • My kid was a tomboy and is an only child. Now I wish she would wear less eyeliner and crap! If it REALLY bugs you, talk to her doctor about it and see what they say. I used to actually wish I was a boy but I couldn't be more girl!

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 12:31 AM on Apr. 30, 2011

  • CallMeAngie, that is so cute and funny! I would ask her but she is pretty speech delayed and doesn't grasp the concept of "wh" questions that well yet.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:44 AM on Apr. 30, 2011

  • I know no parent wants to here this but you may be dealing with a Transgender child..that absolutely knows and feels they are a boy. Even if biologically they are a girl. Do some research on it. theres a lot of support groups for parents in your same situation. Ask her WHY she thinks shes a boy. Theres a big difference between just having tom-boyish ways and absolutely demanding that shes a boy and preferring everything boy over girl. Good luck

    Answer by SweetPoison at 1:06 AM on Apr. 30, 2011

  • I think I'll have to wait another year or so and see if her language develops enough so that I can ask her "why". And maybe (hopefully) it will be gone by then. Thanks ladies!

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 1:09 AM on Apr. 30, 2011

  • I was the SAME way when I was growing up. I wanted to be a boy. it could be that she just wants to be a boy and will grow out of it, she will be a tom boy or maybe there is something else going on. you could take her to a child therapist that KNOWS about gender identity disorders in children. (you HAVE to make sure the therapist is well versed in this area) they will be able to help her be happy with herself, whether its as a girl or a boy. the biggest thing here is that youre child is happy. That is what is most important, not what a child wants to wear, or be refered to as. if you deal with this issue now when shes young, her life will be much easier and happier.

    if you want to talk more with me about this feel free to message me. I know a bit about the topic and I'm always here for support

    Answer by ElsaSalsaaa at 1:09 AM on Apr. 30, 2011

Next question in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Next question overall (Religious Debate)
Curse You!