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Im sure this has been answered before but...

how do you stop a tantrum that has already started? or at least deescalate it? im at a loss. my son will be 5 in june and im so ready to pull my hair all out. ive heard tantrum with them so in the middle of my apartment parking lot i sat on the ground and start kicking and screaming (and boy did i feel like an idiot when the mailman looked at me lol) i must have screamed for two full minutes. i was no better off when i was finished then when i had started. i know what triggered it (ds needed a nap and i made the mistake of telling him he was getting one when we got upstairs) ive gotten pretty good at preventing them for the most part, but once they start its like they have a mind of their own and ds just looses control of his own body. anyways long story short his shirt got wet and then he wanted to go upstairs. im at my wits end! im about ready to treat him like a cat and chase him around with a spray bottle when he is tantruming... (but no i would never do that) please give me some advice. i usually try to ignore them but there are times i just cant....

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mommy06and09

Asked by mommy06and09 at 6:56 PM on Apr. 30, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 11 (531 Credits)
Answers (3)
  • Honestly...for me..it depends in what caused the tantrum and where we are. With my 4yo it works really well if i ignore him. Example; we are in the car and it starts i turn up the radio and literally ignore him. Eventually he stops...will ask me to please turn down the radio and will then say "im sorry mommy". But i am finding that taking stuff away is stsrting to work. My 4yo son really enjoys playing with friends in the apartments...so if he is doing something or axting in a way i dont like i give him two warnings and tell him " no friends" this is usually enough to make it stop. But...these things.do not work with my 8yo step son...so its a matter of what works for u amd your child...
    momti

    Answer by momti at 7:09 PM on Apr. 30, 2011

  • Get down to his level, give him eye contact and tell him that his behavior is unacceptable and if he doesn't stop he will be going in the "chill zone" which can be a bean bag in a quiet room, a guest room, or a corner of the room. If he does not start calming down or at least try to, put him in the "chill zone" and tell him he is to stay there until he can calm down and talk to you. If he gets up, continue to put him back. When he has calmed down, get down to his level again and explain to him that you can't understand him when he screams and cries but when he talks to you and tells you what's wrong, you can help. Make sure you talk to him about why he was upset. Eventually he'll understand that tantrums will get him nowhere and that he needs to stay calm and talk to you.
    MamaStuart

    Answer by MamaStuart at 7:19 PM on Apr. 30, 2011

  • put him in time out 1 min per year old he is (5 min) & it has to be done each & every time no matter where you are.. he will eventually stop also I like mamastuart answer.
    maiahlynn

    Answer by maiahlynn at 10:41 PM on Apr. 30, 2011

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