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My son doesnt graduate until next year, but we already know by July we have to start paying for graduation (SR pics, cap and gown etc). We also have to have a request in for tickets before Fall. We are not given a guarantee on extra tickets, each student can get 6, more if requested early if they can swing it. So heres the situation.

We live in a small town with my dh, his parents, me, my older dd whose 21, her husband, their two kids, a 19 yr old son, 11 yr old son, and 6 yr old dd. Obviously we wont all be able to go. My dd and 19 yr old will give up their tickets no problem. My 11 & 6 yr old will probably have to go since my inlaws are being invited. They have helped my son a lot.

My parents live 8 hours away and dont do anything for my son. My son has not had the best relationship with them. He is Autistic and my mom once told him he needed to be in a mental hospital because he was crazy during one of his fits. Now he is not nearly like he was before, you would never know he had Autism now. They still do nothing for him, but everything for the older 2 kids. But he, my 11 and 6 yr old never get as much for bdays or holidays. My older 2 get money monthly, extra bday and Christmas and all that. He does not want to invite them.

His dad also is not in his life much. But dad wants tickets, and also wants to bring his wife. My son has no want or need for his wife to come and has said no, he cannot bring her. He said IF he gets an extra ticket he MIGHT invite dad, but bringing the step mom is a deal breaker.
Given the situation should I force my son to ask for more tickets and invite his grandparents (my p arents) and his step mom? I am thinking no. He has worked hard and I think he should use his tickets for what he wants. He is getting extra tickets for his gf and her parents though. They are all very close.


Asked by gemgem at 1:21 PM on May. 1, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Level 42 (148,630 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (7)
  • Senior photographs - yes, you do have to use the school photographer for the shot that is in the yearbook, but for those fun extra photographs, you do NOT have to use the school photographer.

    Only ask those people that HE wants to come to his graduation. Have a great outdoor cookout at home - more intimate - no need for reservations - everyone not talking over everyone else in the restaurant to be heard. We've done this with our two oldest boys and my daughter is wanting the same thing. All our family and friends over to the house for hamburgers and hot dogs in the backyard.

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 2:28 PM on May. 1, 2011

  • Looks like you answered your own question. Your son only gets one chance to graduate. After all his hard work, he deserves to surround himself with the people he most wants to share it with.

    Congrats! My son graduates next year too. Where did the time go?

    Answer by EgoTryptophan at 1:29 PM on May. 1, 2011

  • Thanks. Its what I thought, I just wanted second opinions. I dont want any drama, and wanted to make sure I should not be encouraging him to invite them and suck it up.

    Comment by gemgem (original poster) at 1:33 PM on May. 1, 2011

  • It should be his decision.

    Answer by meooma at 1:37 PM on May. 1, 2011

  • BTW, to save on senior pics, call a college that is local, and ask for the photography dept. Ask for a reference to a recent/current/former student that is close, and try to contact them for a shoot. You can get a cd with a copyright release and print them at Walmart or

    As for the tickets, go ahead and have him request extras, that way, he has them later if he changes his mind... and if he decides not to use them, he can give them to someone else. Relationships can change drastically over a year. He doesn't want to be caught stuck in the mud later on.

    Answer by matobe at 1:39 PM on May. 1, 2011

  • Thanks. We have to use their photographer for the photo in the yearbook. But I do have someone to do some for me to give away. Theres no way I can afford the $300 they want from the photographer at the school lol.

    The relationship with his step mom wont be changing lol. That much I can pretty much guarantee.

    Comment by gemgem (original poster) at 1:49 PM on May. 1, 2011

  • Yeah I am thinking we are going to have a small get together after wards. We have tons of cousins, their kids, family friends, his church friends, and all of that. I will probably invite his dad to come to the after party. But not the wife. Its one thing my sons set on. He said his grandparents can come to any after events. At home is a great idea. I had thought maybe a banquet room, but at home would work. Thanks.

    Comment by gemgem (original poster) at 2:31 PM on May. 1, 2011