Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

How do i disapline my 3 1/2 year old when i live in an apartment?

i live in an apartment building. a new resedent moved in and had a new babie. My oldest son i havent really disaplined him and now im trying he throws huge fits, screaming and crying and hitting. I have started putting him in time out but because we let him get away with so much he is so loud. I just had the cops called to my home for the second time because of this. im so upset and i dont want my kids to end up bad or in jail because i cant seem to disapline them with out the cops being called. I really really need some advice i want my kids to behave and be disaplined. what should i do??

Answer Question
 
memamamonkey

Asked by memamamonkey at 11:01 PM on May. 1, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 3 (15 Credits)
Answers (8)
  • if you spank him, spank him for throwing a fit too. if you put him in time out, tell him for every minute he cries the longer he has to sit there
    TiffanieK

    Answer by TiffanieK at 11:03 PM on May. 1, 2011

  • you need to take control you should have started sooner... you prob. agree but theres no time like the present don't yell and don't argue remember your child is 3 and 1/2 your going to have to set the rules and stick to them... a schedule helps too
    traren

    Answer by traren at 11:16 PM on May. 1, 2011

  • I disagree with the last poster. I am in no way saying don't spank your kid...because I am a spanker. But your kid is 3. Spanking a crying 3 y/o will not make him stop crying. This is not an option for you.

    For starters I think it's a good idea to speak with your neighbors. Especially those that you know ave called the cops on you. Give them your phone number and explain to them that the last thing you want to do is bother them and if they could please call you before they call the police, you would really appreciate it. If they are understanding enough to do this, and if it's possible, I would suggest taking your son for a little drive or for a walk when he gets upset. I suggest this because it sounds like part of your problem is your loud toddler, and the other problem is that you, of course, don't want police visits, but don't want to bother your neighbors. Doing this only fixes one of those problems. #1
    CafeMomBinky

    Answer by CafeMomBinky at 11:25 PM on May. 1, 2011

  • The same way you'd discipline him in a house?
    SleepyCupcake

    Answer by SleepyCupcake at 11:31 PM on May. 1, 2011

  • When he misbehaves take him out and make him sit in the car for time outs. He can hoot and holler all he wants and it won't make a bit of difference. The car should be off and very boring...no music or anything and doors locked of course.

    I like the suggestion, the longer he wails...the longer he has to sit.

    He KNOWS he has the power and the volume is an issue for you. He is using it to his advantage and you need to find a way to gain the upper hand here.

    I would ALSO make a chart and discuss at a calm non-tantrum time what favorite toy is going on a shelf when he doesn't listen to directions. Give him very clear expectations and if he throws a fit, down to the car he goes for a good time out.

    If all else fails, get some professional advice, but whatever you do, do not let him take advantage of your situation any longer. It will only get worse.
    spottedpony

    Answer by spottedpony at 11:33 PM on May. 1, 2011

  • #2
    additionally, it is going to be a long, hard, loud road to disciplining a child who is not familiar with discipline. Take your boy to the apartment with the baby. Explain to him that when he is loud he wakes up the baby. Maybe then, during a fit or tantrum, try to quiet him enough to realize he has woken up that baby he met.

    You should also consider a move. It might be as necessary as any other reason to move.

    I was forced out of an apartment because the neighbor underneath me didn't like the sound of my roommate lifting weights during the middle of the day.
    CafeMomBinky

    Answer by CafeMomBinky at 11:35 PM on May. 1, 2011

  • i have the same problem my DD is also 3 1/2 and we live upstairs. when she gets angry she starts stomping and kicking the floor so we put her in time out on her bed. if she still misbehaves we spank and return to her bed. she is not allowed to get off her bed until she has stopped crying and kicking. she then has to do what ever she threw a tantrum over (picked up toys ). it has actually started working. oh i had started doing that because our downstairs neighbors are extremely cranky i mean their kids can cry scream and hit walls but even a minute in to my DDs tantrum their banging on my door. GL and i hope something works for you guys!
    VERONICAS_MOM

    Answer by VERONICAS_MOM at 2:09 AM on May. 2, 2011

  • we live in an upstairs apartment, its a split level townhouse. ds is almost 3 1\2, we talk to him and make him listen whe he's throwing a fit so we can try to figure out whats wrong, we have found that saying "calm down" repatedly in a loud, comanding voice until he stops helps. Ds doesnt get anything until he is calmed down and says please. We spank but we do time outs to, for us we do time outs until the crying stops and he can be quiet for 3 mins. He stand up and faces the wall, not close enough to lean on it.
    dreamangel06

    Answer by dreamangel06 at 10:30 AM on May. 2, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.
close Cafemom Join now to connect to other members! Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN