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Custody, Habitat for Humanity, Child Support

My son has lived with me since he was born. (16 MONTHS old now) His father and I were never married, have nothing going on in court either. We ended our relationship one week after I had our son.

I live in a 2 bedroom apartment with my mother. After I gave birth to him, I moved my bed into the living room.I even moved my dresser into the closet of the bedroom to keep it out of the way, and gave my son my room. I am now a partner family with my mother, fiance, and son for Habitat for Humanity and we move into our new 3 bedroom house in 2 months.

The father will take our son when I ask him to, which is once a week or once every two weeks for a few hours or overnight. So I can volunteer or meet with a mechanic for my car. Usually when I call him to pick up our son, he's on his way to a movie or out with his friends.

I want to file for full legal and physical custody and child support.

What would my chances be?

(PLUS, the father lives in a 5 bedroom house with his parents and brother, and our son doesn't have his own bedroom there, they place him in a pack in play in the living room or another person's room at the foot of their bed.)

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 4:32 AM on May. 2, 2011 in Parenting Debate

Answers (8)
  • You need to keep ACCURATE track of everything. When he has him, hours, days of the weeks, etc. Even down to the EXACT time he picks him up and drops him off. Keep track of phone calls. If you call to ask him to take him and he gives an excuse, or whatever... Keep track of ALL money that comes in from your childs father. Money for diapers, wipes, etc... It's not often when a court will give custody to the father, but having all these things documented will DEFINITELY help you on your end. I don't see any reason why you wouldn't get full custody. Make sure you have a RUNNING and RELIABLE vehicle before you start the court battle, this is important to have. Child must have his OWN bed, but not necessarily his own room. Plenty of youngsters share rooms with mom for a while.

    Good luck, and you have nothing to worry about.

    Answer by AtHomeMommy-3 at 4:51 AM on May. 2, 2011

  • I have kept some documentation, but there are gaps in the information I've recorded. I have saved a text from him when he said to me something like, "you'll get your money when you get it" which seemed rude to me.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 5:02 AM on May. 2, 2011

  • Also a text of him acting jealously

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 5:03 AM on May. 2, 2011

  • If you file for complete and physical custody, your opening a" big ole can of worms", The courts are not going to grant this unless the father is in agreement with giving up his rights! In other words, they're not gonna just take his rights away just because of the sleeping arrangements where he resides or even the fact that you have him most of the time. When you take him to court for child support, the judge will set the 2 of you , up on a visitation schedule, where the father gets him every other weekend and a couple days a week for a few hours I guess you need to decide if this is what you want, like I said , unless you think he will "give up his rights voluntarily and be a nice guy and just pay you support like you deserve, think about it, cause he has rights to his son, the same as you do! I've been through this as well, when you get courts involved, they decide how it's gonna go! Good luck!


    Answer by anichols1 at 6:00 AM on May. 2, 2011

  • Why don't you just spend a little money and talk to a lawyer about custody. I always thought that if you where not married to the man and he did not go to court, that you had custody.

    Answer by louise2 at 6:35 AM on May. 2, 2011

  • Do you know that if you do not file for custody of your child, that the father can come and pick him up and does not have to drop him back off?? Filing for custody has nothing to do with him filing for visitation. Does he have his own room, his own bed, is your house clean, adequate food, water, a working refrigerator and stove, is he up to date on all shots........ have you even thought about talking to his dad and telling his dad, hey, I want to get custody established (only if you are on good terms with him) It has nothing to do with Child support either...Go talk to an attorney, but it is something that is very important to have done when you aren't married to the other parent. Filing for custody, has nothing to do with taking the fathers rights away from him.... Go talk to an attorney, a lot of them do free consultations...and every state is different. Good Luck.

    Answer by kitchenwitch78 at 6:48 AM on May. 2, 2011

  • what you seek is custody while granting him visitation.. you can go to a lawyer, get the papers printed and go to a notory with your ex to have them signed if you can both come up with an agreement outside of court. once thats been established you can file for child support.

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 9:34 AM on May. 2, 2011

  • Custody is not based on the number of rooms in a house.

    Answer by meooma at 4:49 PM on May. 2, 2011

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