my son is 6 1/2 and we have a similar problem. In my sons case I'm under the impression he's exhausted and overwhelmed from the day and is unintentionally taking it out on me.
only recently did we finally tweak our afterschool rules to the point they work for us
snack immediately upon walking in the door (protein and carbs and as long as there's no bad notes from the teacher in his bag, usually a hershey kiss or 2) and talking about BOTH our days, the good and the bad
we then organize any homework he may have or not have
I then have a MANDATORY 30 minute cool down time in bed. It can be with a book, soft toy, or a toy like a magna doodle that has no batteries/electronics. If he's bored the whole 30 minutes then so be it. If he sleeps, he sleeps. If he stays in bed and is quiet, he then earns outside/bike/movie/tv/etc time.
at 1:06 PM on May. 3, 2011