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2 Bumps

How to get rid of the StepMom Blues?

I am a step mom of 2 bm of three and I have really been getting it lately with BM. I ignore her but she does things to draw attention or to stir up a situation. Or actions have affected my household. How to not let this woman get under my skin?

Answer Question
 
cmerc19

Asked by cmerc19 at 1:51 PM on May. 3, 2011 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 7 (167 Credits)
Answers (4)
  • I would have a heart to heart, face to face, chat with her alone. Let it all out on the table; let her spill her side as well. I have been a step mom in two relationships now, and when a BM is doing things in spite or other it usualy has something to do with these 3 things:
    She has some issues with the way you are doing things.
    She is not happy with her situation and wants you to feel it.
    She wants to gain back the, I'll take her side from the ex - hubby.

    being a step parent is never easy and you are always stuck in that rut with someone. You just have to remain strong, focus on the kids and never ever play sides with the children. When it comes to the grown up relationships remind them that the children can gain the best of both worlds out of the relationship. They get three parents to share with and the exwife should be included in on the family events for the kids only 2 stay out of your relationship w hubby.
    A522R

    Answer by A522R at 2:05 PM on May. 3, 2011

  • The biological mother?
    PANZONSMOM

    Answer by PANZONSMOM at 2:06 PM on May. 3, 2011

  • First of all..... I dont agree with being the brady bunch a big happy family..... ESP when the BIO MOM is trying to START STUFF. YOU dont have to spend holidays as this extended family. ( birthday party, school functions can be done in the same room, but not stuck on like BFF). She has issues with you b/c she has issues letting go of the ex... its a control thing. ( i've been going through this crap for a yr) Doesnt matter that she has another in HER life.... she still feels the need to dictate your home too. Once she sees that she can't.. then she will back off , **** what they fail to remember is ITS NOT ABOUT THEM >>>> ITS ABOUT THE CHILDREN <<<<<< and her actions distrupt the kids when they have to listen to the drama of why mommy is being ugly.

    HERE IF YOU WANT TO CHAT MORE.. Just add me
    kkbird

    Answer by kkbird at 2:14 PM on May. 3, 2011

  • I did attempt several times to be friendly with the bio... then after our doing things, or her asking for something... she would later on BLOW ME UP..... then turn around and try to "walk on in our house" like she wasnt talking trash about me 2 days ago!!!! So basically I told her... Either we r gonna G HAW for the sake of the child and try to get along or we're not!!! but I DONT DO FAKE or back and forth!!!! So since OCT.... she stands on the porch!!!!!
    kkbird

    Answer by kkbird at 2:18 PM on May. 3, 2011

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