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I am a little upset and taken aback...

I am 7 months pregnant. (29 weeks) And last night I was experiencing a lot of pain. My lower back was hurting a lot, and I had these horrible menstrual like cramps, and just a bunch of abdominal pain. It really scared me. My boyfriend was in the kitchen getting dinner ready, and I was in the living room laying on the floor in horrific pain... and all he did, was complain that I wasn't in the kitchen helping him. He kept saying "Are you really gonna let me make dinner all by myself?!" I expressed to him numerous times that I was in a lot of pain (as if it wasn't obvious), and that I thought something was really wrong. He literally acted as if he could not see or hear me. !!?? Are you serious?! I looked online, and some of the symptoms I had could have been symptoms of preterm labor. I told him what I found online, and he seemed to not care at all. He gave me my dinner plate...and I just stared at him! "I am not really feeling well enough to eat, so umm...can you get me a glass of water?" He refused!!! Aaahhh! My pain faded, then came back all for about an hour... and my boyfriend just did not care that something could have been wrong. I still don't know what the heck that was. Now, my feelings are really hurt by his lack of a reaction in an emergency. What if something had really been wrong? Does he care at all? I don't really understand. He was such a jerk, and I can't believe that he wanted me to help him make dinner while I was in obvious pain. So odd. I expected more from him, and I'm really disappointed. I'm not really sure what to do about it. Do I bring it up? How am I supposed to bring that up? Does his reaction mean something? I mean, he isnt the best boyfriend...but really, who does that? I don't know if I'm actually asking a question or just venting my frustration. thanks for reading!

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Asked by Tarrar at 8:27 PM on May. 3, 2011 in Relationships

Level 22 (13,733 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • it probably wouldn't hurt to talk to him about when he is in a good mood.

    Answer by febmom007 at 8:29 PM on May. 3, 2011

  • I would have gotten angry. But that is just me. I am glad you are ok.

    Answer by Autumn07 at 8:34 PM on May. 3, 2011

  • What an inconsiderate, selfish, self-absorbed jackass!!!!! If it were me he would be my "EX" boyfriend!!! I would not stay with someone who did not seem to care (or give a damn) that I was hurting and did not seem to give a damn that something could have went wrong with the baby.

    Answer by MizLee at 8:44 PM on May. 3, 2011

  • I certainly would be talking to him about it. Is he open to talking out problems, or dose he close down? Could be what he was doing, he may even have been a little scared.


    Answer by zbee at 8:45 PM on May. 3, 2011

  • I would talk to him. Just bring up that you were upset when he reacted the way he did when you were in pain and what is gonna happen when its the real deal. Him getting you upset is during the actual labor wont be any good on you.

    Answer by ladyb155 at 8:50 PM on May. 3, 2011

  • That's not right! What a dick move!!! Dude, I would talk to him about it, when you are both in a calm mood though. You don't wanna be stressing and then adding more on top of it. not good for the baby, I hope things go well for you! I'm glad to hear that you're okay though

    Answer by Mishie81 at 8:52 PM on May. 3, 2011

  • Ohhh sweetie. His times acomming. LOL! When you go into labor, make sure your wonderful man is standing right next to you the entire time and all those dinners he made under complaints...remind him when your struggling in labor, then remind him hes the reason for all the discomfort your feeling as you bring his child into the world... then when it eases off, tell him you love him so very much. I promise he will have a different attitude on the next baby. I speak with experience. LOL. But in the meantime, dont let him make you feel guilty, if he want to complain about cooking dinner..tell him to order out. Problem solved. If you cant afford it...tell him thats his problem & fix it! If he wants to be an insensitive azz then you can be a demanding witch. Your entitled! and Congrads on the baby!

    Answer by lacyjones at 8:55 PM on May. 3, 2011

  • I would openly say something to him when he is in a better mood. Just bring it up like this say to him- I have a question and it may or may not be dumb (even though it will not be a dumb question. The go on to say to him- the other night when i was in severe pain and u kept yelling at me to get in the kitchen to help, couldn't u see i was in serious pain? and if it was preterm Labor and something was wrong with the baby what would u have done. And then wait to see what he answers to that.
    Then ask if i were to go in labor right now, would u help me and be there or yell at me? wait for his answer. Then if it is nothing u want to hear, then say i think we need to be done but stay friends for the baby.

    Answer by at 9:05 PM on May. 3, 2011

  • 1st off.. THANK GOD UR OK 2.ND what a total jack off .. bt at the same time u dnt know if he is receiveing any time of symptoms as in major mood swings..still doesnt make up for the way he acted. talk to him if hes calm and collecctive apologizes and explain fine bt if he is still acting like a jerk i would cconsider dumping his butt.. u dnt need a man like tht.

    Answer by montoya.k89 at 9:58 PM on May. 3, 2011

  • Glad u and baby r ok!! If hes not going to care about u now what about when you have baby sometimes guys can't deal with stess of having a baby and they start acting like that before the babys born some change others just lav wll most or the act like a***holes all the time

    Answer by flaka500 at 10:03 PM on May. 3, 2011

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