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Is a wedding a deal breaker?

would a wedding be a deal breaker for you? me and BF were talking about it before---
HE wants a wedding... either something 'huge' (his family is huge!) or something 'small'-- either way "its a celebration of our union"

I dont want a wedding. at all. i'd rather just go to the courthouse and sign our names.

LOL I'm aware that we are the opposite than the norm (usually the girl wants the wedding, the man doesnt)

Answer Question

Asked by Shy_Dia at 6:10 AM on May. 4, 2011 in Relationships

Level 15 (2,142 Credits)
Answers (9)
  • It wont really negatively affect you unless you're broke to begin with lol. A small wedding wont kill you, if he wants to do let him have it, I'm sure he'd do the same for you =)

    Answer by xmama_bellax at 6:13 AM on May. 4, 2011

  • I would go along with him to make him happy. If I even asked myself if it was a deal breaker I would question my relationship. There are sometimes a lot harder compromises and trials in marriage than that.

    Answer by Melbornj at 6:15 AM on May. 4, 2011

  • lol we arent really talking of getting married-- just future talk. (i'm SO not ready for the married life.. or even moving in together life! ha)

    but thats the thing-- if i'm willing to give him a wedding, shouldnt he be willing to just go to the courthouse?! lol *tantrum*

    (most likely, with how his family is- i'd be forced into a wedding.. not THAT big of a deal, but i was wondering what other moms thought/felt)

    Comment by Shy_Dia (original poster) at 6:15 AM on May. 4, 2011

  • I think if you can't compromise on how to get married, the marriage probably shouldn't happen as there are going to be other more serious things to compromise on.

    Answer by layh41407 at 6:45 AM on May. 4, 2011

  • My friends had the same issue. what they did was, they went to the courthouse FIRST & got married without anyone knowing. Then later on, they had a wedding just for show for the family. She said the fact that they were already married took so much weight off her shoulders. She also said she couldn't live with herself, if she took a wedding that her SO wanted so much....away from him.

    One thing you have to realize, is that it's very painful for some family members when they cannot be part of their loved ones wedding. if it's something he really wants....why not give that to him if you love him? If you want to make good with his family, i suggest you suck it up. One you're married, it's not all about you anymore. You have to compromise.

    No, that is definitely not a deal breaker...and if you think it is, then you're not ready to get married. You really should compromise on this one..

    Answer by samurai_chica at 6:46 AM on May. 4, 2011

  • And Prince William said something along the lines of - and we were just going to have a small family affair - to Kate's father at the front of the church after he told her she looked beautiful. You have to have a sense of humor about these things.

    Answer by LoveMyDog at 8:40 AM on May. 4, 2011

  • Same thing with my bf and me. He wants a big wedding, has lots of people to invite. I eloped with my ex-husband so yes, a wedding would be nice, but I won't have my entire big Italian family there this time. Immediate only and friends I want. So I am a little worried about how it will go down when we do it.

    I definitely don't see it as a dealbreaker though. Compromises can be made because weddings are not black or white...there are many shades of gray to make each one unique and special!

    Answer by rio_burb at 9:06 AM on May. 4, 2011

  • Its called compromise!! That's what marriage is all about lol-- you agree to a wedding, but he agrees to a small, low pressure, inexpensive me its that simple. I could go either way, my SO wants a bigger wedding, but we've agreed to an intimate backyard wedding w/ close friends and family (mind you, we aren't even engaged- just have talked extensively about it haha).

    Answer by lexi8622 at 12:01 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • have a small wedding in the back yard with just close family and friends.

    Answer by HomeAlone45 at 12:23 PM on May. 4, 2011

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