If you were to meet Jeremiah my 11 y/o you would first notice his big hazel eyes, his cute freckle face and his shy smile. If you were to look further you may notice he is extremely small for his age, weighing in at 62 lbs even and about 4'5". If you spent any time with him you may notice he is very bright, critical thinker. You may notice he gets along better with females than males, you may notice he cannot run, he just really doesnt know how he kind of walks fast and its very awward. You would notice he doesnt look at you when speaking or that it may seem he is looking past you. You may notice he tends to be a bit repetitive, you may notice that he has to sit a certain way, face a certain direction, use something in a certain way or order.
Spend more time with him and you will hear him talk of wanting to have friends, no one liking him, people make fun of him, call him weird, stupid, retarted and he doesnt know why. You may know that he will only eat certain items on certain days. You may find out that on Mondays only he will eat cereal, but he cannot on other days. You may find out that he has to have mayonaisse on everything or he will puke, he cannot have anything soggy touch his lips or he will puke, he cannot eat veggies or fruit or he will puke. You will find out he lives off of certain foods but only at certain times and days.
Spend some more time with him and you may come to realize that he will not wear certain clothing or touch certain items because they bother him to the point of being painful. You will notice he avoids loud noises and bright lights because those too cause him pain. Join him for a meal and you will notice that he sits by himself, by choice because the rest of our food makes him sick. Follow him around more and you will see that he is such a busy boy between school, homework, eating, 3 different therapies a week and social skills classes and then baths and playing that he is very structured.
Be here on a day when one item is taken out of his daily routine weather that be his socks not the right ones for a Tuesday or not having bread in the house for his egg sandwich on Wednesday breakfast, to not having a PB sandwich everyday for lunch with tostitos and bottled water, to not having his insect book available when he sees an insect, and you will see him completely lose it. He becomes a different child, one that seems possesed and almost demon like. The demons within him that force him to lose control over all of his emotions at once causing him to become enraged and become very violent. You would see a mother struggling to keep the other 3 kids safe during these episodes or on the occasion they happen at school to watch you baby boy being taken handcuffed to a stretcher and doped up with anti-psychotic mediation and then him being out of it for a few days until his routine can be established all over again.
Join us during a hunger strike that will consume his body and make him very weak, you pray daily that his little body just doesnt give up on him. I have inthe past feared death due to these hunger strikes, mostly brought on from a new therapy to get him to eat new items. He has been in the hospital with a feeding tube to help him, its not a pretty sight.
Be here on a day when his depression kicks in and you have to make sure all sharp object are put up, including push pins or he will poke himself until he bleeds. Watch him beg me to make the hurt go away, it breaks my heart when he tells me he wants to go see God so he will make him be like everyone else, and take away all the bad feelings.
The next time you think that my child may not die if he cannot have his PB sandwich please reread this and try to understand his world and his life because it differs much from ours. Unless you go through it yourself or know someone with these issues you really cannot make that assumption.
I wish I could change him to make him understand more, to be more compassionate, to feel the way "normal" children do, but I cant, so I do the best that I can as his parent and I follow his routine the best that I can.
Heres a few links on SPD:
Thank you for reading if you read the whole thing!
ETA: Jeremiahs official diagnosis are SPD, Aspergers, Bi-Polar, ADHD and ODD.
Answer by maxsmom11807 at 2:47 PM on May. 4, 2011
Answer by ImaginationMama at 2:50 PM on May. 4, 2011
Answer by zoejains_momma at 2:51 PM on May. 4, 2011
Answer by PrissyT at 2:53 PM on May. 4, 2011
Answer by CallMeAngie at 2:54 PM on May. 4, 2011
Answer by PrissyT at 2:54 PM on May. 4, 2011
Answer by Dahis at 2:57 PM on May. 4, 2011