Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

1 Bump

Do you

feel you choose who you date or talk to based on looks? i'm divorced mom of 2 kids and i've been chatting online for quite sometime and when i chat with someone it's fun, hot and sexy but the minute they send a pic, it goes downhill for me because i don't find them attractive. i know i'm not the finest woman in the world but i'm no dog either. some of them are obese as well and that to me is a huge turn off. i'm sorry i can't see myself having sex with someone that heavy. how about you ladies? feel that way or not?

Answer Question

Asked by lucky35 at 4:08 PM on May. 4, 2011 in Relationships

Level 17 (4,458 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • lol I prefer the guy to be heavier than me...but not obese

    Answer by MexTexmom2 at 4:10 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • I met my husband online and when he sent me a picture of himself I didnt find him attractive really, but his personality was awesome...after we met in person I still didnt really find him all that attractive but there was just something about him that I loved, he became my best friend, then my boyfriend and now my husband and to tell you the truth I have no idea why i DIDNT find him attractive cause now he's drop dead sexy to me....sometimes you just really have to look past the outside and see the person underneath. Good luck honey =)

    Answer by Lucky209 at 4:12 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • u shouldnt go on looks but how they dress and their personality should be important

    Answer by diana398 at 7:37 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • IMO looks should not be top on your list but finding someone at least attractive in some way or having a sexual attraction to them is still important to be there on some level. Does a person have to be shallow hal to find their mate absolutely not, but if you know something is a big turn off for you I wouldn't peruse it because that will always be a turn off. And there are women that like every shape, I happen to prefer very tall men does that mean I wont date a short guy no its just a preference. But a guy who drinks all the time and has a beer gut and is grossly over weight (not medically related but laziness related) is a huge turn off for me and something I just cant deal with. Do I need a GQ model no, is alittle padding for the winter okay sure :) but pure laziness is a deal breaker for me. So find a happy medium of the things that are preferences and deal breakers and go from there.

    Answer by Newfie_Mom at 8:02 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • If you aren't attracted to them, it's pointless. However, you don't need a God to be attracted to. The guy I'm with--when I first met him I was like "Hell no!" 10 years of talking to him and now we are getting married and I find him sexier than anything!

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 8:10 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • no, i don't. I do think looks help, but they come second to me. What is most important to me is that they have good brains & a good heart.

    Lucky for me though, i found a guy who is good lookin', smart & sweet...

    But, if a guy was super awesome but was hard to look at, i think it would be hard for me to jump into a relationship unfortunately.

    Answer by samurai_chica at 8:14 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • well while i do believe that you have to have some sort of attraction to the person you are with , some people do have really shallow standards. I'm not saying you are one of those people though, I wouldn't know. But I don't blame you at all for not wanting to be with someone who is "obese" you didn't use the word a little heavy or not tone so I don't think you have unrealistic expectations. Obesity is a health and mortality issue so i would say it's a reasonable turn off.

    I think that a great personality can make someone who might not otherwise be hot become really attractive. But that is me.

    Answer by kayslay at 8:16 PM on May. 4, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.