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Legal custody?

My ex is willing to give me full physical custody and he gets visitation, (as it has been since our child was born) But he wants shared legal custody...can that work if I'm applying for Medicaid with my son again?
I really want to have full legal and physical custody for many reasons.
We live in a crummy city (because of my ex) and the schools here are TERRIBLE. I want legal custody so I can make the decision to put our son in an online or home school, and my ex wants him to be attending a public school. Plus, I do not plan to live in this city for the rest of my life. What can I do?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 6:41 PM on May. 4, 2011 in Parenting Debate

Answers (10)
  • YOu can try and fight for it but legal custody is not all that bad to agree to. Even if you want to change his school, home school etc you could always go to court and fight for it and show why its better. On top of it if he disagrees and you do it anyway he would have to file for contempt of court because you didnt do what he wanted. If you think he might never pay the money for contempt (usually $500-1500) then it isnt anything to worry with. And no it wouldnt affect medicaid.

    Answer by gemgem at 6:48 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • Unless you have a really, really good reason, you most likely will not get full legal custody. I was told by my lawyer that shared legal custody really doesn't mean anything except you have to consult with your ex before making decisions. You don't have to agree to make a decsion--you can still do what YOU think is best. You just need to consult with him.
    It will not affect Medicaid. My son is disabled and has Medicaid and we have shared legal custody.

    Answer by layh41407 at 6:53 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • Okay, that makes sence.

    Another thing is that I asked him to pick two day s out of the week that he'd take our son but all he says is, "Whatever my days off are I'll take him" But I want this to be set in stone on the specific day so I dont have to waste my time waiting for him to pick up or drop off our son etc... will the court do that or will they just give him a certain amount of hours and let us use whichever days?

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:06 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • They court usually likes set days and times.

    Answer by layh41407 at 7:09 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • I will warn you that while you can move out of the city, courts usually do not like when a parent moves a distance away from the non custodial parent. If you plan to move pretty far away and he takes it to court, the court may agree with your ex.

    Answer by layh41407 at 7:12 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • You didn't mention if he works a strange schedule or if his days off are always the same. A judge will make you have to give your son to him on his days off if thats the type of schedule he works. Try to agree for now and if he doesn't show up or is extremely late then you can go back and say he doesn't show upor he is extremely late. The judge may even award him holidays alternating and summers etc.
    Try to work things out as much as possible without lawyers and judges because the only thing they get is your money and your son wil suffer in the long run. Hope this helps

    Answer by honey1754 at 8:11 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • The court will probably put up set days. You can however after it is decided let him switch days and work with his schedule. If you do that not only is it great for your son but it looks good in court if you ever have to fight him in the future. It is really good to have things set as a guideline. After it is all set though you should work together to make the most out of the visits for your child. That is if he is working at seeing the child and being a good father.


    Answer by Alanaplus3 at 8:23 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • go for full custody with visitation. give him medical shared rights and leave the schooling to you. you can get specific in the details in court

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 12:38 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • Legal custody is really not the big of a concernmost of the time, espeically for the custodial parent. It just covers non-emergency medical care, religious choices & educational choices. At the end of the day the parent with full custody pretty much gets most of the say on those things (although of course if both parents are good they will still work with one another). Joint legal won't effect anything you apply for because it has nothing to do with any of that.

    Answer by BubbaLuva at 11:09 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • in texas, i have management over the kids, we have joint custody, physical and legal. I just have to consutl with my ex about what I feel is right. I have to take his consideration into my decison, but all and all - i have the final say so. I switched the kids school a few years ago. It will be put into the visition about if someone moves over 100 miles away or what it would be if you lived closer. Watch all the wording in this - as mine, say that my ex has to come get and being back the kids to my residence. So, no matter how far away he moves or I move - it's up to him to come get them and bring them back.

    Answer by SassySue123 at 10:45 PM on May. 5, 2011

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