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Has anyone that's been through a divorce had their spouse refuse to divorce them?

My husband doesn't want a divorce, I do. I'm not doing counseling as his stupid a** won't go, and I'm tired of trying to make it work for numerous reasons that I won't ramble on about here. Anyways, my question is... can you go through with a divorce if the person you are divorcing refuses to sign the paperwork, or in my case throws it away? I don't know anyone this has happened to and I tried calling a few family law attorneys in the city we were married (my hometown) but they wouldn't consulte with me over the phone. I figured I'd ask here and see if anyone might know. Any helpful info is much appreciated.


Asked by Anonymous at 8:28 PM on May. 4, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • Yes you can. Get an attorney or do the papers yourself and have him served. If he doesn't contest it then you file the final papers and the judge signs them. If he contests because he "doesn't want to get divorced" trust me, the judge will sign them anyway.

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 8:30 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • My ex wouldn't agree to a divorce. The law in NC is you have to be separated for a year, so after that year passed my attorney (I think) went to court for me. Anyway, she took care of it and we were divorced.

    Answer by missanc at 8:30 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • You can get a divorce whether he wants it or not. As long as you have proof that he has received the papers & the time & date of the divorce hearing, you can go without him. The judge will ask for the proof of advisement, have the bailiff call out his name 3 times, then proceed with your divorce.

    Answer by specialwingz at 8:35 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • It will depend on your state. ALL states give the option to divorce against your partners wishes, but when and how will vary state to state. In PA, you have to file and then wait 24 months before you can do it w/o him... Other states you my have a longer, or lesser wait time - or none at all...

    Answer by SabrinaMBowen at 8:42 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • You didnt mention any extra circumstances but in some states they will shorten the amount of the wait time for certain circumstances. At least that is what my lawyer told me when we first started the mess that is my divorce.

    Answer by Newfie_Mom at 8:52 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • My divorce finally defaulted. After X amount of time my lawyer went to the courts and it was finalized. Part of my wait time was 90 days for something or another. This was over 5 years ago.

    This may help you: Divorce laws by state


    Answer by Rosehawk at 9:10 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • It depends on your state, but all states have laws that you can eventually divorce without the persons consent. That doesn't mean that the property agreement and/or custody agreement are decided without their consent though. All it means is that you are no longer legally married and if you wanted to you could remarry.

    Answer by aeneva at 9:41 PM on May. 4, 2011

  • Thanks for the comments ladies, and thank you for the link Rosehawk. Thankfully we haven't purchased any properties or vehicles since our marriage, everything we have we bought before marriage. Money and such wouldn't be a fight either, we both keep what we make. Custody isn't a big deal, I want my kids to see their dad as often as they/he would like. He's an awful husband but a great dad.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 10:39 PM on May. 4, 2011