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What should I do...?

Okay so me and hubby were watching this game show tonight and we both like to guess answers before they come up. Well respectively so we choose our answers and it turns out I was wrong. So what does he do? What does he say to me next? "OooooH Shut the fuck up and get the hell out of here" When said that I just got up and walked out. He didnt even come to apologuise until after his show was over. I don't know if I am over reacting, but he is constantly saying things to put me down or make me feel bad. Then when I try to bring it up he says "oh your right, I am a horrible husband. I do everything wrong all the time." When that isn't true he is just trying to make me feel guilty for saying something. I just don't know what to do. I love him so much but i don't like how he treats me sometimes.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 7:20 AM on May. 5, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • I do but then he just goes off on me. Like fine i guess I am not going to talk or play with you ever again. Like he is some type of baby. Here is another time for instance, I had just got done cleaning the house and he came home. Well I was resting for a minute and he saw me sitting down when for a rest when he came in and he told me to "get off my lazy ass and cook him his dinner". It is just the inappropraite things he says

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:27 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • It's hard to get a man like that to take you seriously. Say, "No, you're not a horrible husband, you don't do everything wrong. That's not what I said, and you know that. What I said was I don't appreciate the way you talk to me, there's no need for it, and I think I deserve a little more respect from you."
    Or, you know, something along those lines. Don't let him close the subject by flipping it around on you. That's what teenagers do, not grown ups.
    Keep standing up for yourself momma!

    Answer by Nicoles2LilRams at 7:27 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • Thanks Nicoles2LilRams, easy said then done, but I am gonna keep trying.


    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:30 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • Some men have to belittle their wives or SO so they can feel better about themselves, others have been taught that way, and others seem to seriously not realize they are doing it.. Does he think it's a joke when he says it???? Abuse comes in more forms than broken bones and bruises. I can sit here and tell you to leave him and this and have to find the strength in yourself to find the right answer, is this something he does on top of other things? Are you trying to find a reason to leave?? You do know that you can love someone with all your heart, but not be with them because it is the best thing for you.....Just sayin. I hope it gets better for you, and if you show him that it's not going to fly with you anymore he'll change or you won't think twice about walking away. Good Luck.

    Answer by kitchenwitch78 at 7:31 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • When my dh swears I get irritated. Then I start swearing.. but mainly I just look at him. I think if it irritated me enough to the point where I'd be saying to him "Come and get your beep beeping dinner!" "Your beeping clothes are beeping ready for tomorrow." "I think your beeping special, love bug!" You know what happens when I start using foul language? He gets upset and he tells me. Here's my reply "Oh, okaaayyy! Now you know how I feel when you swear at me." also we don't swear in front of the kids as we don't want them talking like that. I guess I had to speak to my dh in a way that he got. And he did.

    Answer by Autumn07 at 7:38 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • Well maybe he got in the macho guy mode, and it sounds like he responded in a way he would if he were playing video games with a bunch of guys. You really think he meant it to cut you down? Of course I don't either of you, but I'm thinking maybe he responded that way b/c he didn't mean it the way you took it. You know how football players do their rediculous touchdown dance? Maybe that comment was his little "touchdown dance" Did he call you stupid or dumb or call you a name?

    Answer by yesmaam at 8:00 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • Ok and I just read the make me some dinner post you made, Um at most I'd throw a freakin frozen hungry man dinner in the microwave and throw it on the table and say, here babe have a nice dinner.

    Answer by yesmaam at 8:01 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • You know, without other details, it sounds a lot like emotional abuse to this social worker. Sounds like you need to sit him down and set some limits for how you will communicate with each other. And remember, he can't make you feel bad about yourself! Only you can do that! don't accept the way he treats you, we teach people how to treat us! Don't accept this behavior from him any longer! Use the "I feel" statements when he pulls this shit. You know, "When you speak that way to me I feel..." Good luck with whatever you decide to do!

    Answer by dwmom2008 at 8:58 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • I would outright say - DON'T TALK TO ME THAT WAY! I'm not your dog to kick. Demand respect!

    Answer by tasches at 1:50 PM on May. 5, 2011

  • He just knocks me down with his words all the time. Like last night I was not feeling good and I still cooked dinner for him which was stuffed shells. however it was not the lasgna he wanted and he was angry about it. He said my food was horrible and that I should have just made what he wanted in the first place. It is a constant power struggle with him. He knows I have no where to turn because my family was against me marrying him. So I am pretty much on my own.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 2:34 AM on May. 9, 2011

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