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4 Bumps

How do you feel about your husband looking at porn? adult content

I have confronted him on several occasions because it bothers me. I don't know why it bothers me but it does. He says that he needs it to masturbate and he masturbates normally when I am asleep late at night after he gets home from work. I have woke up a few times to the bed shaking. We have a decent sex life. Some times are better than others. He will either look at the computer or find a movie on Netflix that has a sex scene in it. He doesn't hide it. He doesn't clear the history most times and he doesn't feel like he is doing anything wrong. I have expressed my feelings about it constantly and I don't understand why he just doesn't stop...am I being ridiculous about this?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 10:21 AM on May. 5, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (17)
  • wow,he does it right in the bed next to you?! DAMN!
    I'm not really ok with it. We discussed how it makes us feel and decided not to go down that road
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 10:25 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • Been there, done that. I was totally disgusted by my dh use of it years ago. He never understood why it bothered me so. His response, well at least I am not cheating. It just made me feel weird, like I wasn't good enough or pretty enough for him. After some time and LOTS of tears, he has stopped. Our relationship even improved.
    AngieBry

    Answer by AngieBry at 10:26 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • I'm not married but I don't mind my SO looking at it. We've even watched it together, but waking up to him doing it in bed is gross IMO, he could atleast wait to be alone.
    June_Mama09

    Answer by June_Mama09 at 10:27 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • He don't look at porn. We have watched it together a few times but it's really not our thing.
    darter

    Answer by darter at 10:29 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • I would ask him if a a few minutes of feeling good is worth more to him than your feelings on the subject that shakes your foundation. Maybe he needs to know how much it really bothers you.
    wendydays

    Answer by wendydays at 10:31 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • It is normal for you to eels this way. And it is also normal that he does it. If it is not interfering with his daily life, and your sex life is still healthy I would suggest this compromise:
    Don't leave "evidence"
    My hubby knows that I don't want to see realitykings in the browser history or the playboy lying on the bedstand. If I don't know when he's doing it, I won't be thinking about it and it won't piss me off.
    Nicoles2LilRams

    Answer by Nicoles2LilRams at 10:32 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • In your case I would also tell him that includes doing it somewhere else when you are sleeping.
    Nicoles2LilRams

    Answer by Nicoles2LilRams at 10:35 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • I hate it. It never did bother me before, but he then became addicted to it and was turning me down for sex, but then using it at night when I went to bed.... and trying to hide it. I almost left him. He stopped doing it, because he finally realized how much it hurt me. I am still paranoid that he does it sometimes, but at least its nothing like it was before!
    MommaRoxanne

    Answer by MommaRoxanne at 10:38 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • I'm with you, I can not handle my man doing that to himself, if he chooses to do it while I am not there and I do not know about it than that is his thing.............to wake up to the bed shaking cause he feels the need to have an orgasm is just plain selfish in my opinion, hello I'm right there and if I am there have the decency to go to the bathroom and do your thing. AS for porn not my thing!!! Don't get me wrong I love being with my man but in no way does watching someone else get off do anything for me I guess sexual experience is something shared between 2 people and if you need that to get in the mood to have intercourse with your man or vise versa him with you then something needs to be looked at.......JMO
    buttonlts

    Answer by buttonlts at 10:45 AM on May. 5, 2011

  • I think its completely natural and would worry more if my husband didnt look at porn.
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 11:13 AM on May. 5, 2011

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