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How to deal with mother in law

Me and my boyfriend aren't married yet. Our daughter is 5 months old. His mother borrowed money from us before our daughter was born and I want it back. With this added she is saying that i'm threatening her. She also changed her number so we couldn't call her. you can tell she did something wrong. Also, I am trying to make ends meet due to being the holidays and i'm the mother of her granddaughter. My boyfriend doens't want anything to do with her either. IDK what to do. She is writting his sister e-mails about going to dinner and inviting "them" (which would be us) with them only to drop off his nana. Since sh'es older wont want to stay long so we wouldn't either. How do I deal with that/

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Asked by MadeylnsMom at 9:43 PM on Dec. 4, 2008 in Relationships

Level 1 (0 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • Well she is avoiding you it seems so take it to small claims court.

    Answer by Anonymous at 9:44 PM on Dec. 4, 2008

  • It doesn't sound as though you'll be getting the money back. With relatives this happens sometimes. Don't lend her money in the future unless it is money you can afford to lose.

    Answer by Bmat at 9:51 PM on Dec. 4, 2008

  • so dont go. i know it will be hard, since she is the gma and you want the baby to have memories with gma but all in all, if she's only inviting you to drop her off, dont do it. if she does ask anything about it just say that you're staying home or being with your parents, or anyone else. also forget about the money, but remember not to give in the future. so many wives would love to not have the mil in the picture, you cant force people to have relationships with kids, tis why so many do not get child support for years. live your life, with your baby. the immediate family is the most important. everyone else is just a bystander.

    Answer by imanixon2 at 9:57 PM on Dec. 4, 2008

  • Take it to court. I agree.

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:08 PM on Dec. 4, 2008

  • Email her and ask her when you can expect to receive the money she owes you so you can pay your bills and have xmas. If she doesn't have it all then tell her to set up a payment plan so you can put it in your budget (or the bank).

    Answer by admckenzie at 11:04 PM on Dec. 4, 2008

  • We loaned a lot of money to my IL's a few years ago and have never gotten it back. I've given up on ever seeing any of it. This is why I've always believed that it's never a good idea to loan money to family. It causes way too many problems. Maybe you could email her and let her know that you need the money for her grandchild and see what she says. It doesn't sound like she plans on paying you back though, sorry. Hopefully you can get it worked out.

    Answer by Anonymous at 11:38 PM on Dec. 4, 2008

  • You shouldn't lend money you ever expect on getting back. If you can't afford to give you shouldn't lend it. Especially to family. If someone in the family needs help it should be given unconditionally. What's more important, the money or your husband's and child's relationship with his mother? Sounds to me like you're putting the money first. Let it go, give him his mother back, let your child have her grandmother.


    Answer by Chrissy629 at 6:38 AM on Dec. 5, 2008

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