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It's been like 5 years...

It’s been like five years. a guy I dated for a little over a year, still calls me every evening. it didn't really bother me until the other day when he was telling me about an old friend he added to his facebook and the next day, called me earlier then usual to let me know, where he was before his cell phone battery died.
It just hit me a few hours later after the call - as to why did he felt he had to explain adding a female to his facebook page, I'd told him, that was great that that what facebook was for - finding old friends, etc..
I have thought about asking, why do you still call me, etc? or even asking him to stop. I can't or maybe I should. I was the one who broke off the relationship and I can't bring myself to hurt him again. HE is a great friend, we see each every working day, as we work in the same building.
What to do?
I've debated with myself over the years if I'd want a relationship with him again or not - he is almost 15 years older. I do care for him and worry about him. He tells me when he'll be out of town, where he's going, etc
I don't know. it does bother me that he still calls sometimes but maybe I'd miss him call and hearing his voice. We left things, with maybe someday, we'd be back together. It's been almost five years.
I guess my fear is that I could be leading him on? I can't hurt him, again. He is a very special guy. At this point in my life, I'm happy alone caring for my kids. He knows this and says he understands.


Asked by Anonymous at 10:47 PM on May. 5, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (4)
  • You're a very good person to be concerned about his feelings. I do think you should reiterate to him that you are happy where you are at right now and if he has found someone you will be happy for him. Remind him that right now you don't want a relationship, but you enjoy your friendship with him.

    It does sound like he is still in love with you. You can make a clean break and it will hurt, but it will also give him a chance to move on and find someone else. Or you can try again and see if what was missing before is there now, and if not THEN make a clean break. Whatever you think will make you and him the happiest.

    Good luck, mama.

    Answer by Ati_13 at 10:54 PM on May. 5, 2011

  • OH MY are we sharing a brain!! im going threw the almost same thing, i have a guy i used to date that i found on myspace, he called me after i looked him up and we chat often, things are good but then hell tell me about a woman he dating or hell say he cant talk tonight someone is waiting for him at home,,,,, i about flip my lid!! i relly relly should care< but i do!!!!! its like the other day we were talking and he said he was turned on, i was like so u called to tell me u have a boner! what am i suppose to do with that information, we are relly just friends but sometimes we tip toe over the friend line, not fulling but we say things that friends should say to each other, i just want u to know u werent alone and hope things do what ever there suppose to do work out however i guess!!! LOL!!!

    Answer by carol00 at 10:56 PM on May. 5, 2011

  • I am assuming he just hasn't found anyone special yet, but if you enjoy his friendship then go for it. But don't lead him on, make sure he knows you don't want to get back together. And NO sex ever!

    Answer by JackieGirl007 at 12:03 PM on May. 6, 2011

  • No, we have not even held hands sense to break up. We're friends, I just wonder sometimes what he's thinking to keep calling and checking in with me. I'm very thankful for his friendship.. I just don't want to end up hurting him, again.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:50 PM on May. 6, 2011