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How do you seperate being upset with your hubby andputting on a smile for the kids?

My life had no school today so I had a day to sleep in a little but my hubby was upset I turned off the alarm apparently he had to get his car to the shop so now there's tension and the kids are bouncing around happy and I'm disturbed.

 
rinamomof2

Asked by rinamomof2 at 10:23 AM on May. 6, 2011 in General Parenting

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Answers (10)
  • I don't always do a very good job of this.
    jmpj8107

    Answer by jmpj8107 at 10:49 AM on May. 6, 2011

  • it's OK if your kids see you upset. That is life...no reason to sugar coat it & act like people don't argue sometimes....
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 10:25 AM on May. 6, 2011

  • as long as you guys aren't being nasty, vile & disrespectful towards each other in front of the kids....i think it's good for kids to see that even people who love each other get upset sometimes.....that is reality & they'll have to deal with it too some day.
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 10:27 AM on May. 6, 2011

  • I agree with samurai chica,how we handle our feelings will greatly affect our children. Just take time out and breathe go for a walk,work off the steam.
    MarGeee

    Answer by MarGeee at 10:30 AM on May. 6, 2011

  • Life is not perfect and neither are you and your husband. Your children should see conflict and resolution. They don't need to see WW-III (though it may just happen) . Shielding them from every little slip does them no good. We have to remember that children learn what they live. So if they learn that you can have a disagreement and settle it and come back together then that is what they will do in their lives.

    It needs repeating .... Children learn what they live!
    sipn_mom

    Answer by sipn_mom at 10:38 AM on May. 6, 2011

  • Play a game with them? Kids rub off on you pretty easily, don't they?
    yesmaam

    Answer by yesmaam at 10:26 AM on May. 6, 2011

  • I'm not sure how I do it, but it's literally like night and day when my husband and I are fighting. I keep it together so well...afterall its not their faults and your not mad at them...
    BeachyBabe

    Answer by BeachyBabe at 10:33 AM on May. 6, 2011

  • I'd love to know. I just try to put it aside for a minute and do something fun or take them outside if I can. It's extremely hard for me because lately he's been pretty insensitive and it's really irritating me. I think it's ok that kids see us working through issues but I don't think it's okay to argue in front of them. It's a tough thing. I have a hard time doing much when I'm irritated with DH because I really hate for there to be problems and not work them out immediately but we usually don't get to do that.
    Anonymous

    Answer by Anonymous at 10:35 AM on May. 6, 2011

  • I agree with the pps. To a certain extent, it's ok for kids to see that their parents aren't always happy with each other, but that just because you aren't happy with each other doesn't mean you don't love each other still.

    I have always tried to teach my kids that it's ok to not like me or my dh, or for us to not like them, or for me and dh to not like each other (NOT like we all run around not liking each other, but I'm saying that SOMETIMES we don't like each other...) that's ok - because we're human and we aren't always going to like each other all the time - BUT - the good thing about families is even when we don't like each other - we STILL LOVE each other - and we will get over being mad or upset :-)

    cont
    sailorwifenmom

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 10:35 AM on May. 6, 2011

  • cont

    You just go about things like normal - play with the kids, hang out with them, etc. If they notice and say anything about it, then you can just tell them that Mommy and Daddy aren't very happy with each other right now, but that's ok, we just need some time to be unhappy. Just like when you and ___ (siblings name) sometimes aren't very happy with each other, but after awhile, you're friends again :-)

    sailorwifenmom

    Answer by sailorwifenmom at 10:37 AM on May. 6, 2011

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