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Anyone with four kids where the first three are all close in age and the fourth is at least 5 years younger? wondering how that affected your family - the other kids and family dynamics and activities.

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Asked by karen393 at 12:29 AM on Dec. 5, 2008 in Tweens (9-12)

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  • Don't know if I can necessarily relate, except to say that my husband has two sisters close to his age and then a little brother 17 years younger than he is (he just turned 14 this year) The thing is, my SIL was pregnant at the same time, and her son is three days older than her little brother, lol. Because he is around the same age as all of our kids, we sort of regard him as if he were just another nephew, if that makes any sense. The kids in the family don't really see him as an uncle, either, they see him more as a cousin to play with.

    Answer by mamapotter at 12:43 AM on Dec. 5, 2008

  • That is real specific criteria you set forth. LOL My SS is 9 years older than DD. Unfortunately for him when she came along his life was impacted. He enjoys having his little sister. But he also has less time and attention from his father. I don't even know if DH realizes it but he treats them differently. Some of it may be the age, too. SS is sort of an ass being a tween and all. His personality really conflicts with DHs. He is a lot like his BM and on some level it bugs DH. We did have to put a stop on letting his mom sign him up for whatever, which she was keen on doing without even consenting us first. But, really, adding any child to the mix is going to make you have to adjust things within the family dynamic.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:43 AM on Dec. 5, 2008

  • Also, with our situation, the situation that surrounded SS's conception and the whole mess of everything impacted the type of father DH was/is to him. DH admits that he is much more patient with DD than he ever was with SS. Part of it was age, and part simply wanting to have a child the second time around vs not wanting it, but dealing with it the first time.
    I think you change as a parent over time and having children that far apart sometimes means they get a different parent.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:46 AM on Dec. 5, 2008

  • My older 3 are about each 3 yrs apart. Then there is an 8 yr gap to my next daughter. It was actually kind of fun for the older kids because there was no rivilary with this child. They just loved her to death! It was kind of hard dragging the baby along to my son's wrestling matches (she hated the loud noise at first but she got used to it). It's nice to have someone around to REALLY help you when you need it (I had someone to listen for the baby & actually be able to DO something about it while i was in the shower!) I think having the age gap was a good thing really. I always have told the teenagers when she was little "THIS is what its like to have a baby! In case you ever had that thought in your head..."

    Answer by Anonymous at 1:15 AM on Dec. 5, 2008

  • Lol...well, I had a little sister who is four years younger than me and then my baby sister is 10 years younger. Nothing ever really conflicted. My mom dragged my baby sister everywhere we went. We loved and adored her. My dad's youngest sister also is 10 years younger than him and they were like that also, but even tho he loves my aunt he always sd she got special treatment because she was the "baby" play-fight about it

    Answer by YanniSmoMMy at 2:10 AM on Dec. 5, 2008

  • I am the oldest of four, the youngest is 9yrs younger than me and four years younger than the last sibling. I dont think there is much conflict really and like the other mom stated, we just took my sister everywhere and she was adored by all of us. My mom made the comment once about my lil sis not knowing who the Flintstones or the Jetsons were, things like that because by the time she was old enough to watch cartoons....she couldnt because of us older ones...we hogged the TV LOL My lil sis was a spunky one and wanted to do everything the big kids did. I remember her having to play t-ball because it was her age group but she mopped the floor with those kids because she always played with us at home and was already hitting off of a pitched ball. Today she is a loving adult who in some ways is a more responsible adult than me :)

    Answer by Heather_F at 10:45 AM on Dec. 5, 2008

  • My older 2 sons are 2 and half yrs. apart followed closely by their sister 18 months after my 2nd.Then there is almost 5 yrs between her and my youngest son,they are now 12,9,8 and 3.
    It's hectic rushing from one activity to another but the older 3 have always been good with the little one.Now that he's getting older though he can be a pest to them! But it was nice to enjoy him as an infant with the others being at school and being willing helpers.The downside? He's now out of a travel cot so we really can't get away with all squeezing into one hotel room if we're away on vacation! 2 rooms too expensive,our vacations are few and far between now:(

    Answer by momof413 at 3:05 PM on Dec. 5, 2008

    SON 26
    SON 17
    the 17 & 8 yr old fight all the time!

    Answer by tntornado45 at 4:30 PM on Dec. 5, 2008

  • I have three boys 13-10-7 one girl 11 they dont get along too well with the youngest and to meits heart breaking.

    Answer by Anonymous at 12:43 PM on Dec. 6, 2008

  • My 3 daughters 1-bio 2-step are all teenagers and my son is 3. They all adore their little brother and dote on him, except when they are busy doing something between each other. He tends to follow the 2 girls who are both 13 around and try to get involved in everything they do-they get frustrated. My oldest step is 16, she spoils him and plays with him alot. Of course, the other 2 being so close they are ALWAYS doing something together, so my oldest is happy to have the 3 year old for company. She actually prefers to play with him, than her annoying younger sisters. LOL I sometimes feel bad for him though cause he does'nt have anybody his age to play with him. My 2 skids only come 3 weekends a month, which isn't much really. My 13 yr,. old who is home with him 24/7 is busy with friends and such, so my hubby and I play with him as much as possible.

    Answer by Ilovemy5joys at 12:51 AM on Dec. 8, 2008

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