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3 Bumps

Death threat to my husband from ex UPDATE

Here are a few text messages between me and my ex. I'm wondering if any of these are considered violent, jealous, angry, or something to be afraid of?

Him: But when would you be getting back home and who are you going with?
Him: Who are you going with though?
Him: Ill be at your place at 850 have fun with (name of fiance here)

(When asking him to watch our son for a few hours)

Him: Tell him I said ill kill him if he showes up:)
Him:I'm not joiking though

(When our son was having his 1st birthday party, ex refused to allow my fiance to come to the party)

ME: What do you say to...you me and (my fiance's name) going out for lunch?
Him:I already have plans
Me:You dont even know when yet...
Him:(so and so) and I are going to (so and so) today. if you have something to tell me you can text it to me.
Him:there is no rivalry plain and simple if there ever was he won and i was to to screw off and deal with it i wont go to lunch cause theres nothing to talk about


(my fiance and I wanted to invite him to lunch so we could sit down and talk about them "shaking hands" and being nice to eachother. My fiance was the one who asked if we could do this)



The issue is that my ex is incredibly rude to my soon to be husband, and I have a kid with my ex. I really want to move to my new husband's home state with him and his whole family....but I need to know I'd be able to do so with evidence of my ex's jealousy and death threats like this?

 

 

p.S. MY EX CHEATED ON ME THROUGH OUR ENTIRE RELATIONSHIP, AND WE NEVER GOT MARRIED. WE EVEN WENT TO COUNSELING AND OUR COUNSELOR RECODNIZED HIS CHEATING AND ANGER ISSUES.

ALSO, WE DON'T HAVE A PARENTING PLAN SET UP. NO COURT ORDERS EITHER.

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 2:51 AM on May. 8, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (13)
  • First, I would wonder about the mental health of your soon to be hubby. I do not know many men who would want to meet the EX. And I do not think it s rude of your EX to be the way he is. Think about...u r gonna be having sex with another man, his child is gonna be living with another man that will considered the 'step-dad'. Jealousy is normal in sitution like this, its human. How long have u too been divorced? Its also youir EX right not to want the new dh there for his child's b-day. U could have maybe had a seperate party just for u guys. How would u feel if the shoe was on the other foot? Flaunting his wife to be in your face? Knowing she is having the sex u 2 used to have? If ypur EX doesn't want to play nice, its his right and its natural. As for the death and violence..where? The comment "I kill him if he shows up? I am not joking" Unless the EX has a violent past, ain't noithing there really.
    Michigan-Mom74

    Answer by Michigan-Mom74 at 3:20 AM on May. 8, 2011

  • I'd show it to your Lawyer
    monstersmommy20

    Answer by monstersmommy20 at 3:21 AM on May. 8, 2011

  • Do u too have a custody agreement? Like the child gets to spend an X amount of days with dad, and and X amount of days with u? If so, and unless the EX says its ok, u will not be able to move out of state without the written permission of the EX and the judge.
    Michigan-Mom74

    Answer by Michigan-Mom74 at 3:24 AM on May. 8, 2011

  • i agree with michigan mom. i also think you are just looking for him to say the wrong thing so the court will see him as a monster and you will get the ok to move to another state with his and your kid. tsk...
    gwen20

    Answer by gwen20 at 3:25 AM on May. 8, 2011

  • I third Michigan-Mom
    laird6372

    Answer by laird6372 at 7:00 AM on May. 8, 2011

  • Have your own birthday party. It really seems awkward to get the exs and new mates together even for a party.
    Honda309

    Answer by Honda309 at 7:22 AM on May. 8, 2011

  • He sounds like an immature child. I mean, your husband is going to be in your guys' sons & HIS life no matter what so he needs to put his negative feelings aside & suck it up for the sake of your son, even though its a rough situation for him, he needs to make it feel comfortable for the child. After all your husband sounds like a good guy, to want to try and work it out. Thats called a man & until your ex can come to reality & grow up.. good luck with the whole moving situation!
    Milani_Hunni

    Answer by Milani_Hunni at 7:31 AM on May. 8, 2011

  • Yikes! I think you should show your attorney. If he has a violent past or you think there is ANY chance he might act on it you need to show the police and look into a protection order.
    tspillane

    Answer by tspillane at 7:47 AM on May. 8, 2011

  • RELAX before taking the desicion
    GlitteribonMom

    Answer by GlitteribonMom at 7:52 AM on May. 8, 2011

  • I will give you this bit of wisdom. He doesn't want to play. He doesn't want to make nicey nice, and he wants your boyfriend to make himself scarce at things to do with his child. I doubt if he will kill anyone. Stop trying to force him to have a friendship with your BF. Your BF needs to cut it out as well. The thing about breaking up with someone is that you don't have to be nice. You don't even have to be polite. For the sake of the child, all should just keep their mouths shut and not force friendships on anyone. I would hate to be in the position that you describe putting your ex in. If you are calling him, texting him, and in any way over explaining what is going on with your life now, you are part of the problem. Be part of the solution by keeping your relationship as a parent on a non emotional business like basis. Emails are better than texts. Only call him or text him if there is something extremely important.
    lilangilyn

    Answer by lilangilyn at 10:17 AM on May. 8, 2011

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