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3 Bumps

Husband has not initiated sex for over 1 month adult content

My DH and I have a fantastic marriage, except sex. There is barely any and I am not quite sure why? I know he gets turned on by me- sometimes he will rub up against me and secretly let me know he is turned on. But whenever he does that it is when the kids are awake or it just isn't a convenient time. He doesn't complain about the lack of sex, either. It is almost like we have accepted this as the norm.
I know I could initiate but I want him to..I want him to want me when our flirting can go "all the way." I guess I just don't understand why he isn't wanting sex....any advice before I join the monestary?

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 12:35 PM on May. 9, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • He probably wants YOU to initiate. If you're sitting there wanting him to initiate & he's sitting there wanting you to initiate...it's aint ever going to happen.
    This happened in my marriage. I always used to expected him to initiate sex for us to get it on. I was getting really frustrated at times & i started bringing it up saying "what the hell, why aren't we having sex" He laughed at me & sweetly said "all you gotta do is touch it babe"....well...after blushing...i realized he was right. I can't expect him to always be the one to initiate, i thought it must make him feel like i never want him & i think he did feel that way. The fact that i was never initiating made him more insecure.

    Well...now that i know all i have to do is "touch it" we have come a long way. Both of us initiate sex a lot more often & our sex life has gotten even better. Communication is key, let him know how you feel..and rotate initiation...lol...
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 12:42 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • Men can't read minds. You need to tell him what you want. You being the aggressor might not be what you thought you wanted, but most guys really love that. Sex with kids in the house gets tricky. Talk about it. Take care of your relationship in all aspects to keep your family strong. It onlyu takes a tiny splinter in any area to turn in to something huge later on.
    GrnEyedGrandma

    Answer by GrnEyedGrandma at 12:39 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • And maybe he wants YOU to... Sometimes guys like to know that they're wanted, they're just not as good as us girls at saying so!!!
    CeeCee333

    Answer by CeeCee333 at 12:37 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • Maybe he is tired of initiating sex maybe he wants to feel wanted too. try initiating it a couple times and then tell him it's his turn. fair is fair
    nurse_maya

    Answer by nurse_maya at 12:37 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • before you join a monastery, i'd get handy with myself. those monastery girls aren't much on the fun-roster.

    dullscissors

    Answer by dullscissors at 12:38 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • Maybe its time for you to get it on?
    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 12:38 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • He wont ever complain about the lack of sex but that doesnt mean that hes not wanting it. I think thats an excuse allot of us mothers use that the kids are awake and running around and so that means no sex. Wrong! You get what you put into your marriage and trust me you can find the time even when the kids are awake. If my son is watching a show on tv and our baby is in her swing my husband and I will sneak off and lock the bedroom door for 10 min or less while we have quick sex. So yes you can find the time,gl!
    LANDENSMOMMYlmk

    Answer by LANDENSMOMMYlmk at 12:42 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • Maybe he wants the same as u, why does HE have to initiate it?? I initiate sex far more often than my SO does, and as much as I'd love him to do it- I'm not going to not have sex and complain when I can just simply initiate it..the more I do, the more my SO wants it and once in a while he surprises me. Not all men want it all day every day, sounds like your SO is like mine lol
    lexi8622

    Answer by lexi8622 at 12:42 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • NikkiVan- i cook almost every meal at home, he doesn't look at any porn, and I have lost weight, not gained. He tells me I am beautiful and how could he have gotten so lucky, almost every day. Seriously, I hit the jackpot with this man except the sex!!!
    Anonymous

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 12:40 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • sorry for my typos hope that made sense...lol
    samurai_chica

    Answer by samurai_chica at 12:44 PM on May. 9, 2011