On my side of the family:
I was the 4th grandbaby born, and was born to my gma's youngest daughter. Gma never forgets MY birthday. I am the only grandchild of hers that had children and was married.
Why on EARTH do my children continue to be thought of less often, taken fewer places, and called less often?? It just comes across to me that my gma feels like her other 5 take precedence over mine. Two belong to a cousin that is bipolar and very unstable, no father figure, one belongs to a cousin whose ex-fiance was killed in Afghanistan last year (she was so caught up with the ex the baby daddy left) two belong to another cousin, which one she doesn't have custody of due to prior drug problems, the second caught meningicocemia at 6mos old, now 2 1/2, still having surgeries. Comes across to me that she feels like she has to make up to the kids for their parents' mistakes, and since we don't ask her for money, or run away and dump our kids on her for two weeks while we drive to Mexico on money we don't have, and that my children have a great relationship with both me and my husband, that she doesn't have to check in or say happy bday, merry Christmas. I hate that because we're not a mole on her ass that we don't count!!
Also, Dh's gma made a 6hr drive to sit for 2 days in a hospital waiting for Dh's cousin's wife to deliver their second. We live 2 hrs from her, and our oldest is two, and shes never met him. We finally quit asking her to visit, or if we were in her area, she makes excuses not to be home.
Even our church made a huge deal about this baby. They are very well-off, given every advantage from the day they were born, the church had 5 BABY SHOWERS for them! And our congregation is an average about 2700/service. Our babies didn't even merit a congratulations announcement in the program. We did my first Ds' baby dedication the same day as their first dd, and my Ds was in 11 of the 35 pictures posted on the wall, 4 by himself.
I am just starting to feel like we just need to cut ties. I'm not sure it is worth even bringing to their attention, as I don't want to be the desperate mom trying to get her kids noticed, but I do care when we show up to functions, and people they are equal in relation to don't treat them the same!
Any advice to help ease this would be appreciated.
Answer by aschwarz06 at 1:40 PM on May. 9, 2011
Answer by kimigogo at 1:57 PM on May. 9, 2011
They are important to you and your dh. Accept the fact that they are not as important to anyone else. I say this because my own mother, who I miss every single day of my life, rarely did anything for my children but always did for my sister's children. when I finally asked her why her response was "because you always manage to do for yours, your sisters struggle". That's just my experience.
Answer by meooma at 1:58 PM on May. 9, 2011
Answer by MaryMW at 1:59 PM on May. 9, 2011
Answer by Anonymous at 1:40 PM on May. 9, 2011
Answer by Ashoonik at 1:49 PM on May. 9, 2011
Answer by pinkdragon36 at 1:53 PM on May. 9, 2011
Answer by mamaprincess001 at 2:06 PM on May. 9, 2011
Answer by gdiamante at 3:55 PM on May. 9, 2011