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Open this can of worms?

First I am a non confrontational person. My 11 yr old lives with his dad after much drama and being taken to court so many times I lost count. His dad has made my life hell ever since I remarried. My son was fine and taken care of when my ex was with his gf. I didnt like her, but she did take care of my son. They broke up last summer. Since then things have slowly gotten worse and worse. My ex is not handling being a single dad well at all. He also has another child with his latest ex he is trying to care for. But he refuses to give my son back to me without forcing me to go to court. I am sure I can win, but again, I hate drama.

Anyway, as the school year has gone on hes been on welfare (TANF the whole 9 yards). My husband & I have been supplying my son with 100% of his clothes, shoes, school supplies and any extras since June 2010 with no help from his dad. His dad finally got a job and off welfare. He still isnt not contributing to any of it. I got an email from my sons teacher. He has had 18 tardies and 6 absences, and has missed 50% of his speech therapy. He is showing up dirty, tired, unkept, and is always late. I am at my wits end and do have a lawyer on retainer at all times.

Do I bring it up to my ex, or just go to court? I am so pissed and angry. I dont want to say something Ill regret, but kinda feel I should say something. I also know it wont help. But what should I do?


Asked by Anonymous at 3:53 PM on May. 9, 2011 in General Parenting

This question is closed.
Answers (11)
  • Talk to the lawyer, show him/her the documentation from teacher and your concerns, and then take him back to court for custody.

    Answer by MizLee at 4:18 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • I'd take him back to court, and bring all the documentation you can get your hands on. Good Luck

    Answer by meooma at 3:55 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • Just go to court.

    Answer by Kari727 at 3:55 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • I'd go to court. If you can do a better job, you owe it to your son.

    Answer by Hausermom at 3:56 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • Can you simply talk to your Ex. & say that you would love to take the pressure off him & take custody to care for the child now? If you can't talk to him then go to court. Why wait? This is for your Son's welfare. Right?

    Answer by ILovemyPaulie at 4:06 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • Just go back to court and let your lawyer take care of telling the EX.

    Answer by louise2 at 4:24 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • Thanks and we can. We had him until he was 7 and like I said alot of drama involving ex's newest ex. We just let it go since our son was alright at that time. But now, I just don;t feel like I can let it go anymore.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:59 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • Either call DCS/DSS to do a check on him,home etc or "since your attorney is on retainer" tell him to draw up papers for you to get your son back, explaining the conditions and school records as back up. OR JUST TELL EX.... that you are not happy with the living conditions etc and want to have son live with you.

    Answer by kkbird at 3:59 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • We already told my ex that. I told him when he got on welfare obviously the situation was not good for my son. We have stable jobs, a stable home, furniture, a place to live without worrying month to month and cars with bumpers (lol). My ex said he was not giving him back. I had to force him.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 4:01 PM on May. 9, 2011

  • Time to go back to court!

    Answer by tspillane at 4:37 PM on May. 9, 2011