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Is your dh a wet blanket when it comes to visiting your side of the family?

my dh agrees to go with me all the time to visit. but i HATE for him to be there because he just sits, sometimes falls asleep. he makes no attempt to be social. He sometimes will push me to wrap things up. i would rather him stay at home. However, if he doesnt want to go..i often find myself blowing things off too and just staying at home with him. How do i get to where i can feel comfortable going out by myself and not feel guilty leaving him at home? I want to get out and have fun again. ..maybe when i'm never home he will finally want to get out of the house to do something with me. (and actually enjoy himself.) idk. anyone else ever deal with this?

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shay1130

Asked by shay1130 at 11:07 AM on May. 10, 2011 in Relationships

Level 27 (32,809 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • Make the first step to head out by yourself otherwise it won't happen.

    Good luck!
    Simplicity3

    Answer by Simplicity3 at 11:09 AM on May. 10, 2011

  • He has no problem being social with anyone.
    meooma

    Answer by meooma at 11:16 AM on May. 10, 2011

  • My hubby goes with me but it's a 3 hour trip to stay with my parents so we stay for the weekend. He is a social person and will talk to anyone but the only thing my family does is sit around anyway so he just hangs out. He doesn't really love my family but he puts up with it. I think he just doesn't want me to go there and leave him home alone all weekend. You should ask your hubby if he'd like to be alone when u leave and if he says no then tell him why dont u have fun or act like ur enjoying urself? Maybe you should just go by urself sometimes
    Butterflysky_24

    Answer by Butterflysky_24 at 11:19 AM on May. 10, 2011

  • Hubby and I don't do social things without each other. We agree that if we do that it's not respecting our marriage. As for family visits, thankfully we have similar situations, our families are very selfish, and don't get together, ever... However we are traveling 2000 miles to see his Mom and StepDad in CA in a couple months and we look forward to it, mostly for our kids, because they can't wait to see them. We plan to have some us time when the kiddos are with the Grandparents.
    Get your Hubby on board with going out with you, make a weekly date night, invite a couple to go along... Get to know your Hubby all over again. We get lost in the family life, and it's good for your children see you as a couple as well as Mom and Dad.
    MrsLeftlane

    Answer by MrsLeftlane at 11:20 AM on May. 10, 2011

  • Hey you go and enjoy your family no matter how he acts. You don't have to be embarrased by his actions they all know how he is, Its you they want and Love. My mother died 5 years ago and my father 30 years ago. I don't care how anyone feels if they were here I would visit them all the time, You only have the family God gave you and one life, enjoy them please. Explain to your husband this is how it is going to be and if he is uncomfortable he has the choice to not go with you. My sibblings are all 1000 miles away and I miss them and all our family get togethers but I will tell you this, I see my grown children all the time and my 5 grand babes and no one will ever stand in my way or comfort to make this possible in my life. Good Luck Tamara
    panky

    Answer by panky at 11:24 AM on May. 10, 2011

  • I'm lucky here. My DH is very much a family oriented guy. He loves get togethers, reunions, etc. and makes an effort to be part of the action and conversation. The families get along and he is willing to go to whatever events come up. I do the same with his family. My 1st DH was willing to go, but he didn't take part in things so well so I appreciate this.
    jmpj8107

    Answer by jmpj8107 at 11:43 AM on May. 10, 2011

  • My DF makes more of an effort with my family than I do! I'm more like your DH. If the conversation doesn't interest me I just sit there saying nothing or I will get up and leave the room. It's not that I don't love them or want to see them. I just get bored. My DF and I have talked about it cause it bothered him the way it bothers you. That helped some, now that he knows it's cause I'm bored he will change the conversation towards things that might interest me. If I'm doing it, he will ask me if I'm allright and so I will try to feign interest. Honestly, I'm just not much of a conversationalist. That's one of the things I love about him! I get uncomfortable speaking in large groups, even with my own family. He's deffinately the better half when it comes to being social!
    Ms.Gwen

    Answer by Ms.Gwen at 1:07 PM on May. 10, 2011

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