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He wants me to have another kid.. So I'll be entertained??

The only reason I was even considering having another kid is because I really thought my SO wanted another one.. Until he blurted out last night that it'll give me 'something to do'.. I'm a SAHM of a 3 year old. He said he'll stop wanting another kid if I find a hobby, or get more friends.. to bide my time. Maybe I'm being extra sensitive or pre-menstrual.. but this seems like a WRONG reason to have another kid, especially if I was set on having just one. I'm very confused, and don't know what to do.
It almost seemed like an ultimatem.. I didn't realize I was so 'bored' at home until he mentioned it! I'm doing a great job at raising our daughter, cleaning, cooking! What do I do???

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:19 PM on Dec. 5, 2008 in Relationships

Answers (8)
  • do what you feel is right for you! if you're comfortable w/ one child and don't feel ready for another,then wait and see how things go. don't do it b/c he suggested it will give you something to do-that's absurd! i'm sure you have your work cut out for you being a SAHM, you don't NEED to add to your workload unless you're ready for another child.

    Answer by pinkclover at 1:30 PM on Dec. 5, 2008

  • I do not think we should have children so we will have something to do. When you are ready, you will know. Hopefully he will understand


    Answer by virginiamama71 at 1:46 PM on Dec. 5, 2008

  • Um that was so insensitive of him it is amazing! It is not PMS it is your taking exception to a man who made a rude rude remark. Jeeze, I am sorry but I would let him have it for that one.

    Answer by salexander at 2:23 PM on Dec. 5, 2008

  • Yes entertainment is the wrong reason for having another child. Tell him if he'd fill in the void then you could save the time and money of rearing another child and training an entertainer. It amazes me that men think we have children because we're bored and lonely!

    Answer by admckenzie at 2:24 PM on Dec. 5, 2008

  • Then I'd get a hobby or find a friend... fast lol
    Seriously maybe he's concerned about you spending so much time alone. If you're not going out much, I can understand what he might mean. Your child needs fresh air, sunshine, and most of all, friends or school is going to be a big shocker. Do you go out much to have playdates? I'd find some of them to join, you and the child (sorry dont know a name) could both meet new people.

    Answer by lisa_ann_p at 3:21 PM on Dec. 5, 2008

  • What I get from his comment, is that he finds you to be a needy person, and is trying to tell you that maybe you need another kid to keep you busy and not bothering him.

    To which I'd say, maybe if you married me and gave me some stability, or if I get a job once our 3 year old begins full day school, THEN I'll have more things to occupy my time. But unless HE wants to take an ACTIVE role in raising a second child, I'd say no way!

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:08 PM on Dec. 5, 2008

  • why is he wanting you to stay busy or is it he wants you out of his hair so he can play ,while your busy with a new baby and a 3 year old . think about it and ck things out and do what you feel is right

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:38 PM on Dec. 5, 2008

  • *OP* I'm never in his hair, and he never plays.. even when I encourage him too.. sigh.

    Answer by Anonymous at 7:55 PM on Dec. 5, 2008

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