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SIl is putting us on the spot, what should we do?

My cousin's wife decided to have an informal party for her son's communion and did not invite the whole family. My sil whose did not get invited to the party is sending an envelope! She is so naive all because her sister who did get invited and is attending will be going and she feels bad that she is close to her... I honestly feel that we were slighted and do not want to have sucker printed acorss my forehead by sending her a gift when she never invited us. Now it looks bad that she is sending something and we are not. WHat should we do?


Asked by geminilove7 at 9:28 AM on May. 11, 2011 in Relationships

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This question is closed.
Answers (8)
  • If they were doing it for the presents they would have invited everyone. If it was a birthday I would say send a card. If it was a birth than send a gift. If it's anything else no invite=no gift.

    Answer by Ms.Gwen at 9:48 AM on May. 11, 2011

  • what makes you feel comfortable....if you did not get invited your have on obligation to send a gift......and they shouldnt expect one from you.....

    Answer by cara124 at 9:32 AM on May. 11, 2011

  • Do what YOU think is right!

    If I do not get a card I do not send a gift.

    Answer by gammie at 9:31 AM on May. 11, 2011

  • If u wernt invited y should u send a gift they didn't want to include u in the event I wouldn't I only would send it if I was invited and couldn't attend

    Answer by rinamomof2 at 9:35 AM on May. 11, 2011

  • I wouldn't worry about what they are doing but if they didn't invite me I wouldn't be sending a gift..

    Answer by momto4girzls at 9:42 AM on May. 11, 2011

  • Stop worrying about what other people are doing.. They did not inviite you. You do not have to give a gift.

    Answer by louise2 at 9:40 AM on May. 11, 2011

  • I guess it depends. I think the days of having some people offer for a bit of soda and chips are pretty much over. The parties that people throw can be over the top expensive anymore. I'm sure the list had to be limited.

    it's up to you, but if it was me I'd send some kind of gift and a card of congratulations. It's a important event in a kids life, and acknowledging that is the important thing.

    My SIL's younger sister got married about a year ago, and I wasn't officially invited, but since I knew her and she's a round about relation Dh and I sent her a gift off the website for a store she was registered for.
    Her family is beyond huge, so I knew that no matter what she probably had to cut the list down, and the wedding was across the country. Even if we had been invited we wouldn't have been able to attend either way.

    She was SO grateful for the gift, and that's the important thing.


    Answer by ItsMe89 at 9:40 AM on May. 11, 2011

  • Itsme89 it is way different if it was a wedding. You have to cut back sometimes. But a small gathering for Sunday brunch?? I don't think so. I will take the advice to not send a gift.

    Comment by geminilove7 (original poster) at 9:52 AM on May. 11, 2011