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I never get to see my grandson !

My DS lives about 2 1/2 hours away, when I want to see my grandson, my DS wants me to PAY him money for me to see my grandson....I understand gas is expensive, but he wants me to pay him his pay for the day of work, even if he has off, when they do bring him down, they only bring enough diapers for a day and one or two outfits so I have to buy him other clothes...the last time I asked for him to come down, I refused to all of the above and stood my ground and was told I guess I will not be able to see my grandson and what a bad grandmother I am......Is it time to get a lawyer?


Asked by dys-shattered at 1:54 AM on May. 12, 2011 in Adult Children (18+)

Level 11 (507 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (20)
  • Hugs ! There are people out there who don't think of others, only themselves. Stay tough and do what you have to to get this resolved. You might be able to get an advocate through your county to help you through this. Best of Luck ... Keep your chin up and your humor strong, it will help through the pain of this. Feel free to add me as friend or message anytime.

    Answer by LeJane at 3:27 PM on May. 12, 2011

  • You may have to let go. I think it is terrible what they are doing. I am also a grandmother and was faced with a similar situation. My grown kids were saying I could not see my grandchild if I continued to see a certain man, now my husband. I didn't let them blackmail me and now I see my grandkids all the time and the kids have grown into having respect for their stepdad. Do you have other children that could help with this? As in driving you? How about a church friend? I think in the long run these grown people are going to get worse not better, though. So sorry. I would stop the funding and if you pray, just pray for your grandchild, because it sounds like he will not learn the good things that children should be learning.

    Answer by lilangilyn at 9:22 AM on May. 12, 2011

  • unfortunately you don't have much legal right even in states that account for gp rights

    Answer by sophistcatdfury at 2:05 AM on May. 12, 2011

  • At least you see him sometimes. My mom lives 1000 miles away and knows that if she wants to see her grandbabies she's paying for flights. Does it suck? Yes but that's life

    Answer by Nicoles2LilRams at 7:20 AM on May. 12, 2011

  • In some states they don't have "grandparent's rights." Make sure your state has them before you waste your time and money on a lawyer.

    Can you not drive or take a bus to visit your granchild? It might be better to get a hotel for a day or two and spend time there than have your "dear" son hold your grandchild ransom!

    Answer by GoodyBrook at 1:57 AM on May. 12, 2011

  • In the state I do live in there are greadnparental rights, problem is I can't drive. The court will grant me rights, but I have to be able to make reasonable efforts to go and get him, which I can not and my son does know this....

    Comment by dys-shattered (original poster) at 2:07 AM on May. 12, 2011

  • Is it medical or otherwise that you can't drive? If possible it is never to late to get a license......

    Answer by LeJane at 2:31 AM on May. 12, 2011

  • Why is it that some grandparents just feel like they can just take their kids to court and for visits with grandchildren? You realize this is not your child right? And if I had to take a day off work and drive 5 hours there and back, for you to see him, you better believe you should help with the gas. It would be one thing if you could just drive there and spend time with him there but you can't, do you see that you are just as much the problem? Oh, and you know that more then likely YOU will have to do all the traveling for the visits right? So if you can't drive, how are you going to manage that one?

    Answer by JLS2388 at 6:40 AM on May. 12, 2011

  • Anon, maybe the son is not being selfish, maybe he can't afford to drive 5 hours and take a day off of work so he asked his mom to help with the cost (as most grandparents would come and pick him up or at least do SOME of the traveling). I think this women is being selfish, she just wants the child to come to her without any effort on her part (not even helping with gas money). You realize that you could be taking food off of your grandson's plate every time you demand his father take off of work and drive 5 hours? It doesn't sound like he wants you to pay for the visit but just help with the cost of it.

    Answer by JLS2388 at 6:44 AM on May. 12, 2011

  • to JLS2388 Don't be too quick to judge me. First of all, I do not drive, and there is no bus train etc to get to where he lives. The days I ask him to bring my grandson down are the days he has OFF WORK so he wouldn't be missing any pay. They do have money to blow on going out every friday and saturday night to party so yeah, they have money. I am not the problem at all, my son and his SO are very selfish immature people and all they do is want want want. I have furnished two apartments and one house for them, all for them to just trash the stuff and ask for more so dont go on a rant about me being the problem..They use my grandson as a ransom. "You can see him if you buy us this" or "You can see him if you pay this bill" I am done paying their bills and buying them crap that they CAN afford. I am DISABLED.. I can NOT drive.

    Comment by dys-shattered (original poster) at 8:57 AM on May. 12, 2011