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Am i paranoid?

my bf/common in law husband own a business , he is 33 and keeps texting a 20 year old worker hours at a time all day and night but says ( and tells her) im paranoid . he says they arent even firends because they dont go anywhere and i said but texting all the time is an employee/ employer relationship? he says things like Do you want to be my roomie and me love you long time , but of course it all just playing around. He could be spending time with me but its spent on texting her . He talked to his pastor about it( who is too stupid to even think he is only getting one side of the story and jerk might be leaving a few facts out ..like he cheated on me before) and the pastor told him women have security problems .........wow.......like i said dude doesnt hear my side of the story. i want to leave but im stuck in a dying business with only my name on it....so he says im acting childish and paranoid , what do you think?

Answer Question
 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 3:55 PM on May. 12, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (11)
  • dump him
    spitfire06

    Answer by spitfire06 at 3:59 PM on May. 12, 2011

  • Your not paranoid !!!
    LARRYSWiiFE

    Answer by LARRYSWiiFE at 4:00 PM on May. 12, 2011

  • Do you want to be my roomie and me love you long time


    Sounds like an ultimatum to me. 

    Simplicity3

    Answer by Simplicity3 at 4:00 PM on May. 12, 2011

  • With this behavior he wouldnt be my boyfriend/common law husband for long...he'd be out on the curb as soon as I could pull my foot back out of his ass
    Lucky209

    Answer by Lucky209 at 4:09 PM on May. 12, 2011

  • I would like to say hi to you and to let you know you are not paranoid. What is a b/f common law? You remember that old saying "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free" He has caused you to have those feelings because he cheated on you in the past and now wants to say it is your head making you feel paranoid. That is so not cool. If he is text'n this 20 year old then why dont you find a 20 year old to text as well, give him a taste of what it feels like. If your not happy then make yourself happy. Sorry i was venting but in all seriousness, 2 wrong's dont make a right. But your not married to this person so what gives. Get out and enjoy life cause it is too short not to. Talk with him again, ask him if he has fallen for another female or has another taken his mind. make him be honest with you, you deserve that. It's ALL about respect, leave that pastor out of it he is prob textn her too- If only you knew
    Esam

    Answer by Esam at 4:11 PM on May. 12, 2011

  • You're not being paranoid. It is inappropriate for him to be texting a 20 year old co-worker about things that are not work related, it is inappropriate that he isn't concerned with your feelings on the matter, especially if he has a history of cheating, and it is inappropriate to say he is going to love her long time. I would tell him to cut it off or you're out of there. His answer will let you know how much this 20 year old means to him and how much you mean to him. If he sincerely believes you have insecurities or are paranoid (which would be somewhat justifiable considering his history and current behavior) then tell him you can get counseling together so that both sides of the story can be told, but in the meantime he still needs to nix the constant texting and focus on his relationship with you. If he doesn't want to do that I think it tells you how important you are to him and that you should move on. Good luck.
    MaryMW

    Answer by MaryMW at 4:16 PM on May. 12, 2011

  • that is not anything like an employee/ employer relationship.......esp. what he is saying to her. If you can move on I would do it because he is treading on cheating again and he thinks he is doing nothing wrong in his diluded mind.
    2boysnaprincess

    Answer by 2boysnaprincess at 4:18 PM on May. 12, 2011

  • GET RID OF HIM NOW!
    SonyaNaomi

    Answer by SonyaNaomi at 4:59 PM on May. 12, 2011

  • Your not paranoid, he's a scumbag and his pastor should not be leading any flock!
    kansasmom1978

    Answer by kansasmom1978 at 5:31 PM on May. 12, 2011

  • No you aren't That sounds just like my 20 yr old daughter. Give him an ultimatum. Stop or get out.
    itsmesteph11

    Answer by itsmesteph11 at 5:46 PM on May. 12, 2011

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