Unfortunately, it looks like things aren't going to work out with my fiance, the father of my 3-year-old DD. With his personality, I don't think that shared custody will be a possibility- he'll most likely try for full custody out of anger at me. I was just hoping for some input from ladies who have been through the court system, or just an educated guess on how this will probably go.
If you think you can help, here are the facts: My DD has severe special needs- she has at least 10 doctors & specialists, sees physical & occupational therapists at school, & takes medicine every morning and evening. I have records of each doctor's appointment, with the majority showing that I was the only one there (same thing with the school- he's never been very involved in that aspect). He's unemployed, taking no type of continuing education, has no driver's license, has a record of driving without a license, assault & battery (not involving me or any family member), & has been involved in multiple domestic violence calls with his mother (he lives with her, & she's had both of her other children taken away & custody given to their fathers). He's also been through a rehab program, but hasn't kept up with the NA & AA meetings like he said he would. Oh, I just remembered, he was put in a psych facility for 2 weeks when he was 18 after he started talking about killing himself.
I live with my parents (no records or home problems at all), am in good standing in a registered nursing program, have a license & a car, & make $400 a month babysitting. I have no record or history, and frankly, if needed, several of my DD's therapists would state that I am a wonderful mother to her ( I'm not bragging, honest, it's just what they've told me before).
So, see why things aren't working? He hid his true self & problems from me for so long, & then I thought I could help him. Now, I've tried everything, & I've realized he has to want a better life for himself. I want the best life for my daughter I can give her, & he's not willing to work toward that end. He loves her, & he loves me, but there are just too many deep-seated issues there for him to grow up & be the kind of man we need in our lives. So, ladies, what do you think? Will I get sole custody here? My state has never done a custody without visitations, but I think I can handle that as long as they're supervised... at least until he does something stupid to mess the arrangement up.... which he will. I;m going to be calling a custody lawyer tomorrow, but I was just hoping for some advice and opinions. Thanks so much, & I apologize for the length!
Answer by LeJane at 8:53 PM on May. 12, 2011
Answer by Kats86 at 9:17 PM on May. 12, 2011
Answer by rinamomof2 at 9:52 PM on May. 12, 2011
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