Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

How to tell the kids mom & dad are divorcing

How did you tell your kids?
How did they take it?
How were they once the split actually happened?
How were they a year later?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 7:21 PM on May. 13, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (7)
  • How old are the kids?

    Answer by SleepingBeautee at 7:22 PM on May. 13, 2011

  • 7 10 and 12

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 7:23 PM on May. 13, 2011

  • my parents told me when i was 8 and i thought it was really effective - something along the lines of "you know how mommy and daddy have been fighting all the time? we know the fighting hurts you and it hurts us too so were going to live separately so that we don't fight anymore and don't put you in the middle."

    Answer by staceface420 at 7:28 PM on May. 13, 2011

  • I have not been in this position but I do know that you want to make sure they know you both love them no matter what and it is about how you and dad get along, not about the kids. Lots of times kids feel guilty and that they did something to cause the breakup, especially the younger they are. hug

    Answer by whitepeppers at 7:28 PM on May. 13, 2011

  • Do you fight alot or are you still civil? If you fight alot chances are the kids can tell something is up the 10 and 12 yo are old enough to understand and will be hurt I'm sure but 2 happy parents who are not togehter are better then 2 unhappy parents who are far as the 7 yo goes and even the other 2 make it a cool thing...I'm assuming 1 or both of you will be finding a diff. home so make it cool to have 2 homes with twice as much...they will have stuff at moms and stuff at dads...let them express there feelings without being defensive in any way even if they say they hate you or is important to tell them before any split happens...even sleeping in diff. rooms may help...GL

    Answer by happymama02 at 7:31 PM on May. 13, 2011

  • it's also importan that they know it;s not there fault at all and that you both love them very much...just be honest with them on there level

    Answer by happymama02 at 7:33 PM on May. 13, 2011

  • Depends on the age and never talk bad about the other parent in front of the kid - common sense, i know, but my ex would talk about me all thetime in front of the kids w/his new gf and just recently my oldest who is now 23 (she was 19 when we divorced) thanked me for being the bigger person during the divorce - because i could of said ALOT of things about the ex but I didn't.

    Answer by PatriciaofMN at 7:50 PM on May. 13, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.