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How do you handle people that tend to make self-deprecating remarks?

I must be around just this type of person fairly regularly and I truly have no interest in being her therapist but don't know how to respond to her remarks about her weight problem.


Asked by nepenthe429 at 8:54 AM on May. 14, 2011 in Relationships

Level 15 (2,063 Credits)
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Answers (14)
  • My come back is hey stop talking about my friend like that or wow feel better now?

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 9:06 AM on May. 14, 2011

  • Just agree with her. It will piss her off and she will stop.

    Answer by emmyandlisa at 9:47 AM on May. 14, 2011

  • I make self deprecating remarks about's just how I deal with the things I don't like about myself...I figure if I say it first someone won't feel the need to point it out to me lol...I didnt know it made other people feel uncomfortable so I thankyou for this I know what I have to work on =)

    Answer by Lucky209 at 12:09 PM on May. 14, 2011

  • Tell her she's beautiful and she'll lose weight when she is ready to. Maybe she is looking for support.

    Answer by Autumn07 at 8:57 AM on May. 14, 2011

  • WOW
    I cant imagine your thoughs when she talks of this. Do she talk about it most of your conversation?
    Suggest taking walks with her or maybe get busy youself when she comes around.
    Buy an ipod, load it and plug it when she starts that talk...

    Answer by Esam at 9:24 AM on May. 14, 2011

  • Let me level with you for a moment, it all depends on the person! For example, my friend says she's fat all the time. Her case, it's true, she knows it and it's her way of dealing with it, but she doesn't focus on just that and she's not a downer about it. I say it because if I do it enough one day i might get the energy to do something about it (by do something, I mean really go at it strong lol). But, I think you are talking about the type of person that is always a downer and pushes her problems onto you.That will ALWAYS drag you down! Maybe she needs to hear someone tell her the truth, I know it bugs the crap outta me when someone says.. no you're not (okay, so i'm not 300lbs, but i'm overweight for my height).. What would you say if I was skinny!?!? Yes you are.. all lies and I know it. I would look at her and say then do something about it, i'll help you if I can! That might completely stop her downer side cuz u agree

    Answer by kbishop8688 at 10:21 AM on May. 14, 2011

  • I tell people that if they don't like something then make a change no matter how small.

    Answer by admckenzie at 10:23 AM on May. 14, 2011

  • There is a lady at work, who skips lunch and says she does not eat at home in the evenings.
    She's always saying she needs to lose weight, ect.
    She is like 49 yrs old!
    I being 15 yrs younger, I don't know what to say to her. I think, she does have self esteem issues.
    Its hard and I don't want to be rude, but...
    I just get fed up with people telling her she's so great and that she needs to eat..
    So, I'm thinking she's doing some of this for attention.
    She has money for food - she goes on big vacations every year and always buying other crap.

    Answer by SassySue123 at 10:33 AM on May. 14, 2011

  • Depends on my mood but I generally will just let them talk and if pressed for some response just say "if you don't like something about yourself change it."

    Answer by meooma at 11:54 AM on May. 14, 2011

  • I would quit griping and support her, unless you just don't like her, then quit being two-faced...

    Answer by SonyaNaomi at 12:31 PM on May. 14, 2011