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2 Bumps

The bean dip method and assert myself method didn't work. What else you got?

I have asked this question before kind of but now it's gotten more complicated. I don't want a VBAC period end of story, no not even a little. My Mother wants me to have one,my MIL wants me to have one ,it is going to be hell when it gets out to the rest of the family and now my husband is basically insisting that I give it a shot. I don't want to breastfeed and I told my Mother that and she was basically crying and my MIL keeps I guess without meaning to suggesting that my son is not a completely normal baby because he's formula fed.

How do you even begin to stand up to all these people let alone my husband? I need productive answers for someone who is painfully shy and horribly hormonal because this is really complicated for me.

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lizziebreath

Asked by lizziebreath at 1:15 AM on May. 15, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 19 (6,846 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • Well, I definitely need more information in order to give you the respectful answers you deserve. First, What are your reasons for not wanting a VBAC? Why are your mother and MIL so dead-set on this method, and why do they seem to think they have ANY say in how you birth your child? Also, what are your reasons for not wanting to breastfeed? ( don't worry, no bashing coming from me either way, just curious). What exactly does your MIL think isn't normal about your son, and how old is he? How far along in your pregnancy are you?
    ShainaMay

    Answer by ShainaMay at 1:20 AM on May. 15, 2011

  • I don't think you should have have to give anyone any kind of reasons as to why you don't want to try a VBAC and you don't want to breastfeed. I don't at all blame you for not wanting to try a VBAC. I'm having my second c-section in 8 days and I don't wanna try for one either. And the breastfeeding, thats also your own decision too. No one else is gonna have to be going through the VBAC or the breastfeeding to have any right to tell you what you should or shouldn't do. Let them know that you are doing what you see as best for you and your baby and to please just respect you for that. I hope everything goes well with your c-section. Good luck, sweetie!
    tiffanynichols

    Answer by tiffanynichols at 1:28 AM on May. 15, 2011

  • Your body=your choice.

    You have to have reason for having such strong opinions- share those reasons with your family, and then do exactly what you want to do. It's not your mom's MIL's or husband's body, so it's not their choices to make-
    Sisteract

    Answer by Sisteract at 2:10 AM on May. 15, 2011

  • @ShainaMay After a lot of information gathering and earnest prayer my answer was no. Despite being according to my doctor a great candidate I still got a no as an answer for the prayer so I believe that I shouldn't question it. My Mom and MIL are people with very strong personalities and I tend to be the more shy type so they feel the need stand up for me against myself I guess,and we are a very close family so we do share our opinions with each other.
    As for breastfeeding I had a lot of things go wrong. Everything started out pretty good then I developed a severe issue with over supply that did not respond well to treatment,which triggered an overactive letdown,which aggrivated a nerve and caused my letdown reflex to feel like trying to pass broken glass through my breasts,which led to my PTSD from my assault being triggered and a panic attack every time I fed my son.
    lizziebreath

    Comment by lizziebreath (original poster) at 12:55 PM on May. 15, 2011

  • Sorry still talking just was running low an characters. My son was born with a severe milk protein allergy that didn't respond to any change in my diet. The overactive letdown did some bad things to his reflux and he got horribly sick and it hurt his tummy every time. I watched it hurt my baby and I can't do that again.
    My son is 9 1/2 months and she told my SIL that it's ok that she can't change diapers because she'll just have to wait for other SIL to have her baby so she can see real baby poop instead of the green stuff. She's called my son's allergies non-exsitant and just an excuse for not wanting to feed him because breast milk can't hurt babies it just can't exsist according to her. And to answer your last question I'm about four weeks if all works well this time.
    lizziebreath

    Comment by lizziebreath (original poster) at 1:10 PM on May. 15, 2011

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