Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

3 Bumps

Am i a big meanie?

my middle child came home from school and asked my a question i couldn't answer. i didn't even know what she was talking about which is why i couldn't answer. on satuday i found the answer. she was asking about a new toy i never heard about. she claims everyone in her class has one. and she wants one. i told her no. we found out that her cousin went out and bought the toy for her son. she later told me that he threw a big fit in the store which is why he got it. am i being a big meanie for not buying my kids everything that they want instead of what they need?


Asked by noel1978 at 9:58 AM on May. 16, 2011 in School-Age Kids (5-8)

Level 24 (20,417 Credits)
This question is closed.
Answers (20)
  • No. Maybe you could introduce a piggy bank, and have her earn money for one. It would be an incredible lesson in savings.

    Answer by ILoveAsherAthan at 9:13 AM on May. 17, 2011

  • Not at all!

    Answer by older at 9:59 AM on May. 16, 2011

  • ohmygosh NO! if i bought everything my son asked for, we'd need a bigger house. don't let your kid guilt you like that!!

    Answer by dullscissors at 10:00 AM on May. 16, 2011

  • Absolutely not! there are wants and there are needs. I use those opportunities to talk with my kids about the difference and how they can earn the things they want by demonstrating responsibility in the household.

    Answer by nepenthe429 at 10:00 AM on May. 16, 2011

  • No. Children who demand things and get them are brats that are being ill served by their parents for raising them that way. Unless they grow up super privileged, they'll find the world less willing to put up with their tantrums and they won't function as effective as those who were raised to learn the value of working for things and prioritizing.

    Answer by bishopblack at 10:03 AM on May. 16, 2011

  • No, I don't just buy things for my dd whenever she wants it. She would have the opportunity to earn it, though.

    Answer by AngieBry at 10:13 AM on May. 16, 2011

  • Hell no you ain't mean. In fact ur teaching you're child everything don't come handed to them on a silver platter they have to work for what they want. Kids who get everything they want usually turn into big brats nobody wants to be around.

    Answer by chica679 at 10:00 AM on May. 16, 2011

  • No. But, it might be a good thing to use a a reward for doing something positive. I always tell my kids to put it on their Birthday or Christmas wish list. I definitely would NOT get it for a kid throwing a fit... totally the wrong message to send!!


    Answer by Crafty26 at 10:00 AM on May. 16, 2011

  • nope! I turn down silly requests like that. I won't just buy something because everyone else has it. for a birthday or holiday I will buy a gift I am sure the kids will enjoy but not a fad toy that will be tossed in a box and forgotten in 3 months time when the new "cool" toy comes

    Answer by zoejains_momma at 10:01 AM on May. 16, 2011

  • Nope, unless you want to raise a spoiled brat you don't buy them something when they throw a fit in the store. Maybe you could get it for your child's birthday or something, but I wouldn't encourage the "I need it because everyone else has it" mentality.

    Answer by scout_mom at 10:02 AM on May. 16, 2011