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Would this bother you or hurt your feelings.

We live 3 hours away from my inlaws and whenever we visit them and I go shopping with my mil, my mil will buy the her other grandkids ( her daughters kids) clothes and stuff but she won't buy for mine. These are her son's kids and just as much her grandkids as the others. WTF!!! By the way they are not needy, we aren't either but it is effed up I think. Would this other you.

 
Anonymous

Asked by Anonymous at 6:02 PM on May. 16, 2011 in Relationships

This question is closed.
Answers (15)
  • that is really messed up. wtf?
    Mel_in_PHX

    Answer by Mel_in_PHX at 6:16 PM on May. 16, 2011

  • Do they live closer? Does she see them more often? if so then maybe she knows what they like and need. It wouldnt really bother me. Im picky about my kids clothes though is why. My mom and inlaws are always trying to buy them cheap clothes from walmart or target. My mil lives by us and has learned now to just have me send her links of what I will actually put the kids in or goes to the right stores. My mom just doesnt buy anymore at all. Maybe she thinks you have a clothing preference too?
    gemgem

    Answer by gemgem at 6:04 PM on May. 16, 2011

  • I think it would bother me. I wouldn't expect it, but I would feel like she chose favorites when all of her grandchildren should be important.
    amberdawnbarr

    Answer by amberdawnbarr at 6:05 PM on May. 16, 2011

  • Have you ever asked her why? I think I would. I would think there is some kind of a reason as to why she buys things for one set and doesn't for the other, and I would ask her. You don't have to be unkind. You just tell her that you have noticed and it has puzzled you as to why and that you would like to hear her answer. Or better yet, have your husband ask her, which would be way smarter. Just be prepared to hear her answer when she gives it.
    NannyB.

    Answer by NannyB. at 6:06 PM on May. 16, 2011

  • I would wonder if she thought their mother was incompetent and that was why she did it my mother does for my brothers because she thinks they are not capable. Know you and your husband do a great job and maybe it would be nice to have or get take a deep breath and be glad you do not need.

    pinkdragon36

    Answer by pinkdragon36 at 6:06 PM on May. 16, 2011

  • That is just rude~
    mkfolan3

    Answer by mkfolan3 at 6:13 PM on May. 16, 2011

  • Does your MIL send Christmas or birthday gifts? I send checks or gift cards for grandkids. That way mom can get what they need. I'm too far away and usually too tired to shop for kids I don't see a lot.
    Kimimale

    Answer by Kimimale at 6:13 PM on May. 16, 2011

  • It would bother me...my MIL does the same thing! My husband has 4 kids before we had our 2. My MIL and FIL buys his 2 other boys clothes, shoes, video game systems, etc but they hardly buy my kids stuff. It mostly bothers me because it shows favorites and eventually the kids will pick up on that and I don't want their feelings to get hurt.
    Ms.Maricel

    Answer by Ms.Maricel at 6:16 PM on May. 16, 2011

  • Has she ever bought things for your kids that you didn't like or use? my mom buys a lot of stuff for my DD and my nieces and nephews too, but she stopped buying for my nieces because their mom treated her gifts like trash and she would always send them back to stay at my mom's house. So my mom thought "if she doesn't like that I buy things for her kids and she doesn't appreciate them and wants them to stay here, then why should I continue?" On the other hand, my other SIL is always so appreciative when my mom buys stuff for my nephews. It's not that any of us need the stuff, but with the economy being what it is I think that gestures like that are a big help and very thoughtful of them. I would say ask your MIL (or have your husband ask) why she doesn't treat the grandkids the same.
    Ashoonik

    Answer by Ashoonik at 6:20 PM on May. 16, 2011

  • No my mil lives in my back door and unfortunately so does my sil and she buys her kids everything ,takes them places, even goes out to play with them but doesn't offer any of that to my girls but I am just fine with that.
    momto4girzls

    Answer by momto4girzls at 6:23 PM on May. 16, 2011

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