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What can i do to help my very shy daughter?

She is soon to be 2 and is super shy. I am talking someone new walks in the room and she quickly runs to me and burys her head in my lap and begins to sob, shy. This just started recently, but it isn't getting any better, actually worse. She is a very happy child and when around family she is fine, but the minute someone new walks in she is in complete panic mode. I explain to those she doesn't know or doesn't know very well that she is shy and give her some time to warm up to them, but it can take weeks for her to get used to them. She acts this way mainly towards men. I don't know what else I can do to help her feel more comfortable. Any advice?

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Asked by amber1330 at 1:53 PM on May. 17, 2011 in Toddlers (1-2)

Level 22 (15,025 Credits)
Answers (7)
  • I don't have any advice really because I'm not shy and neither is my DD but I think your doing the right thing by not forcing or pushing her. GL

    Answer by kayslay at 1:54 PM on May. 17, 2011

  • Also, if someone continues to try to get near her or pick her up she will trash around and scream as though someone is trying to kill her. It is awful.

    Comment by amber1330 (original poster) at 1:55 PM on May. 17, 2011

  • Thrash around

    Comment by amber1330 (original poster) at 1:56 PM on May. 17, 2011

  • My daughter was exactly this way (she still goes and hides when FIL visits b/c we only see him 2-3 times a year). We've finally made progress. I put my DD in a Mommy and Me Dance class to push socializing with new people, while still having the security of Mommy with her. It took about 3 months for her to open up there, but it has been a snowball effect ever since. I seize every opportunity to expose her to new people now, story time at the library, playground, soccer.......... She's still shy withnew people, especially men, but it's so much better than it used to be. Give her time, comfort, and exposure....and most of all don't force her to interact with people. She'll improve.

    Answer by Kimedbs at 2:03 PM on May. 17, 2011

  • Try and get her in a mommy daughter lesson. Something you do with other people and children but where you don't have to let go of her for long. My main suggestion (since the weather is getting warmer), check out your local YMCA for swimming classes. The have classes specifically for toddlers and parents, whether the mother or father. This way she will be around other people, it is something you both can enjoy together, and you both can make new friends! The may also be a children aerobics class for mommy and baby. A great way to stay in shape and teach her young. Also, you would be around other people. ^.^ I hope This helps!


    Answer by F43L34 at 3:04 PM on May. 17, 2011

  • Whatever you do, do not let anyone tell you that she has social anxiety disorder! That's a bogus disorder and don't be surprised if someone will throw it out there.

    I was exactly the same way as a child, painfully shy, even around relatives. My daughter was the same way. We just needed time, security, exposure to the world around us in manageable ways and we eventually came out of that shell. Honestly, if you spent 5 minutes with either of us, you'd never believe that we used to be that way!

    Answer by Anonymous at 3:17 PM on May. 17, 2011

  • Awww my baby girl is like that too but has gotten a lot better. We are mostly only around family. I think its a good idea to take her to the park and let her be around other kids and when in the grocery store talk a lot about what going on in an public environment. When you have visitors in your home introduce who they are and have them come to her and get down to her eye level and introduce themselves.

    Answer by SMITxsM2 at 1:54 PM on May. 18, 2011

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