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Know it all friends...

My BFF has one son who's 13 mths old. I have 2 boys, 9 mths and 2 yrs. Whenever she asks for my advice, I always say the same thing... every child is different. Do what you think is best for your kid. I do not want to come across like I knwo it all... If she persists with the convo, I will tell her how I have handled things with my boys but still remind her that it is ok to do something different.

Anyway, I have been having problems disciplining my 2 yr old. She has seen my husband and I smack he, yell at him, send him to his room... I admit I need help on how to deal with him. Any suggestions are welcome... (I posted another question on this). But we have gotten into a conversation where I said I think it is so hard on us because we have the 2 boys 17 mths apart. Her response was "I don't think that's it at all. There are people who deal with 5, 6, 7 , 8 kids. I don't think that's your real problem." Yes, I know families have many more kids than I do and I commend them. But I believe every family and every child and every situation is different... I need help in my situation not negativism especially when she is not in the same situation and cannot empathize with the frustration I am feeling.

So... should I say something to her? Leave it alone? Avoid talking about my parenting dilemas with her any further? What do you think?

Answer Question
 
RCape

Asked by RCape at 11:33 PM on May. 18, 2011 in General Parenting

Level 6 (136 Credits)
Answers (6)
  • In all honesty....I have three boys and two girls...they are DIFFERENT! One is not easier than the other...just different. She has NO idea about raising boys...and has made it obvious that she does not get your issues.....so just don't ask her. :)
    PsychicSherry

    Answer by PsychicSherry at 11:37 PM on May. 18, 2011

  • I would take what she says with a grain of salt. You know your kids best. I'll address my thoughts about your 2 year old in your other post. :)
    Rosehawk

    Answer by Rosehawk at 11:37 PM on May. 18, 2011

  • Parenting is a very personal things and there is 101 ways to parent on thousands of different issues, so if you feel like she can not talk openly about different ideas and if she cant respect yours I would limit talking to her about it.
    Princess_s21

    Answer by Princess_s21 at 11:40 PM on May. 18, 2011

  • Thank you all. I feel that I am an easy person to talk to and open about my issues. She just really struck a nerve... I appreciate the feedback.
    RCape

    Comment by RCape (original poster) at 11:48 PM on May. 18, 2011

  • Let her know...you just needed someone to vent to, to listen to your frustrations, NOT someone to criticize you. She may not have been meaning to criticize you, either. If you wish to remain friends, just like with your husband, you need to be open and honest with her. Let her know in the best way that what she said hurt you. Try not to do it in an accusatory way, though, because that won't help the situation.
    hopeandglory53

    Answer by hopeandglory53 at 11:50 PM on May. 18, 2011

  • You're right all kids are different, and if she can't empathize or at least remain objective than no i wouldn't ask her anything else about parenting.GL
    Genice6

    Answer by Genice6 at 10:11 AM on May. 19, 2011

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