Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Your thoughts on....

I posted a question last night titled "Proper Etiquette or Faux Paus". I got some good responses but I think I need to provide more info to get more opinions.

The initial question asked other Mom's opinions on a family doing a personal fundraiser for an item they needed (like a vehicle, etc). They were not in any kind of an accident or victim of a fire or natural disaster. They just had a need and they were trying to raise $$$ for a necessary big ticket item.

In this situation, it is a large family (6+ kids) that is in need of a larger than normal vehicle (12 or 15 passenger van) b/c their van has died on them (it was over 13 yrs old with over 200,000 miles on it). The husband is working; they are living paycheck to paycheck (although they have scraped together $2,000 for a down payment).

They are not deep in debt and they live frugally. They just don't have a lot of income so they don't qualify for financing for even a used van. The kind of 'fundraisers' they are wanting to do are things such as car washes, bake sales, knitting scarves and asking for donations, etc. but they are not sure how people feel about giving to a family for a more personal need.

Opinions needed here! The family don't want to come across as wanting 'something for nothing'. FYI ~ at this time, there is no way that extra income can be brought into the home through traditional job scenarios.

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 2:55 PM on May. 19, 2011 in Money & Work

Answers (5)
  • I don't think that flat out asking for donations would be proper, but I do think that providing some sort of service or product is acceptable. It would be nice if our society was a 'pay it forward' type of society as a whole where when a family has a need the community comes together and helps out where they can. Generally this type of behavior is reserved for a tragic event like a hospitalized/sick child, etc. Back in the old days communities would hold barn raisings and help each other out. But this didn't require financial requests upon the donors, just their time. In return, when the donors needed help, everyone would rally around and help out. So in regard to needing a newer vehicle, I just don't know what is proper as far as asking for help, but I definitely wish you luck in figuring it out.

    Answer by slw123 at 3:02 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • I agree that asking for donations (with no service or product) is not proper. So, do you suggest, providing that service or product with a SET price or can you give a 'suggested price' but let them know it is a donation-type situation??

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 3:29 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • suggested price but donatin type situation.

    Answer by mkdirector2011 at 3:40 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • Do they have any church affiliation?

    Answer by tasches at 4:34 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • @tasches ~ this is a Christian family and they are members of a local church; however, the church does not help it's members as they should...which is really sad if you ask me. It isn't just this family the church don't help; it's everyone in the church that has a need.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 5:10 PM on May. 19, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.

Next question in Money & Work
Speeding ticket question...

Next question overall (Pregnancy)
Belly after baby.....