Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Get over it!!

a few months back my BFF decided to leave her husband...but she was being rather dumnb about it and packed up all her crap and her 3 kids and went to a Motel...I was at my SO's for the weekend and she wanted me to come with my 3 kids and stay with her....I told her no...if this is what she really wants then she needs to know what it's going to be like being alone...I thought she was being sooo stupid...she has not worked there entire marriage and had 1 kid by him and had nothing to her name...she said she was going to get ajob is not abusive or anything...if anything she is the abuser..she throws shit at him...he pays all the bills...she gets some child support but puts her youngest in daycare and stays home and does nothing...doesnt cook or clean...she is lucky he still keeps her around IMO but anyways...she went back and they are fine now...her and I were just talking and she brought up how i ditched her in her time of need...GEt the hell over it!!!!! I didnt agree with the way she was handleing things and so no I was not going to go hold her hand through it. was I wrong to not go to her side?

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 4:00 PM on May. 19, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (15)
  • Nope you weren't wrong.

    Answer by Jademom07 at 4:01 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • i don't think you were wrong at have to stand up for what you believe is right, not everyone is going to agree all the time, that's just life. sounds like she was acting childishly...and 2 adults and 6 kids in one motel room sounds like a very uncomfortable situation, I wouldn't have wanted to have my babies in all that mess either

    Answer by sdks2011 at 4:05 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • You dont sound like much of friend talking about her that way. How do you really know what goes on in their home? You don't.
    Stay out of their marriage and problems and worry about yourself.

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 4:07 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • wow, I wouldn't call you much of a friend. Even if I don't agree with a situation or think it is the outcome of what my friend did, if they are feeling bad, depressed or upset I am still there friend and there for them. And yes you did ditch her. We all make mistakes and do dumb things but our friends are supposed to be there to support us. Sorry, I agree with your friend. You could explain your feelings to her after you helped her through that time but to just leave her hanging like that at that moment was crappy. JMO

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:09 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • plus it sounds alittle bit like you are jealous of what she has and that is part of why you didn't support her.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:11 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • I told her to call me anytime through out the night if she needed me to talk...but to drag my kids into it was not something I wanted to do...she was in a bad part of town in a roach infested Motel...I thought she was selfish for wanting me and my kids to go stay with her when I could talk to her on the phone.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 4:11 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • I'm not jelous at all...I live with my SO now and i stay at home as well. I just thought her reasons for leaving and not planning it out better were stupid...mainly not planning it out...she has kids to think about and she wasnt doing that at the time.

    Comment by Anonymous (original poster) at 4:13 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • I would have suggested she come to a better part of town and stay somewhere that was not roach infested. I would not want my "friend" staying someplace like that just like I wouldn't want my family staying there. And I would have helped her with that. Like I said I think your post doesn't really feel like you are this womans true friend at all. Maybe do both of you a favor and just go your seperate ways

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:16 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • Tough love never hurts.

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:16 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • If she wasnt' thinking clearly shouldn't a friend be there for her?

    Answer by Anonymous at 4:16 PM on May. 19, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.