Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

2 Bumps

TMI WARNING... sex life dwindling, anyone have tips or suggestions? adult content

My DH and I used to have the most amazing sex ever... Then it just stopped and everything is so routine, and boring. He wont go down on me but gets frustrated if I don't for him. His version of foreplay is shot to hell, hell use his fingers for all of 2 minutes and needless to say, he can't get me wet anymore which just kills the rest of the night... I want to make suggestions and get suggestions in return but he won't talk about it. I even gave in and tried anal just to try something, anything new rhythmically that's just not for me... I don't know what to do. I love him but the sex basically sucks. EDIT: I don't know what to do... I try to do the sexting, the talking about it to build up for the moment but he dsnt respond... Today was the first time he commented about one and it was to tell me I used bad lighting... When I ask him about his fantasies he doesn't respond, he just shuts up... I was with two people before we got together and other than the things we've already done together I feel like I don't know anything else to try.

Answer Question

Asked by kpincince at 5:12 PM on May. 19, 2011 in Relationships

Level 5 (89 Credits)
Answers (11)
  • Try new potions. Maybe restraints.

    Answer by mommy_of_two388 at 5:17 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • Try role playing or wearing something sexy. Have a night where all it is is foreplay or just making out but dont actually have sex. You will be crazy for each other the next day because you're so turned on. Have sex in different places. Communicate with him and tell him that maybe if there was more foreplay then maybe you would want sex with him more.

    Answer by Eisleysmommy27 at 5:18 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • idk when you find out let me know, heres a bump because i wanna know too mine is the same as yours is

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:18 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • ky products.. ?kama sutra?... no kids for a weekend with dinner and alcohol of choice...

    Answer by girlglow6 at 5:19 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • if he won't talk about it,no answer we suggest will help
    you have to get him talking. Have him tell you his fantasies

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 5:22 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • When they get lazy like that there is nothing that peaks their interest anymore. Okay I am just saying that because I have been married twice. The beginning is fun and new and amazing then life happens and the man just gets lazy. my husband spent the first 5 yrs of our marriage thinking about my needs and now we do it once every month and he is a 3 pump chump. He will flirt with me and tell me things but I blow him off and say "whatever" to him because I am hurt that he no longer makes the effort that he used to. One time I cried because he was a 2 stroke joke and wasn't even worth the time to remove my pants. my first husband was great until he stopped being gentle and caring he went from that to this "give it to me now" attitude that got the ball rolling for me to leave him. I do not know what it is but men get lazy because they know we are here for the quik lay..

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:29 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • Maybe something is going onwith him, especially if he doesnt want to talk about it. i would try and get him to talk. that would be first and formost, and also if you do start suggesting things make sure they are okay with him you wouldnt want him to feel uncomfortable with something your sugesting especially if you have not one it before.... good luck

    Answer by Kambrosino07 at 5:32 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • my dh went thru a spell like this awhile back..i never had a wet problem tho..i pretty much told him to put out or get out..i told him the things that were missing and things we both needed to work on..after being a super bitch for about a month he finally got the hint..

    Answer by Anonymous at 5:33 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • I don't know about this area but I am taking notes

    Answer by 5heartbeats at 5:41 PM on May. 19, 2011

  • I had the same problem... I was frusterated too. After I had my kids we just didn't for what seemed like FOREVER. I had my parents take the kids and we still wouldn't. So I suggested to him to go get a sex toy. Now I'm not talking about a dildo but one of those liitle ones for your spot :) He thought it would be a great idea and was even excited to take control over it and do it for me. So we went and got one together and even ended up finding other stuff too. It's great he has fun and we both get off. We don't even use it all the time but we know it's there. Might work for you too... Oh Another thing I do to keep it going is call him randomly threw out the day and tell him I've been thinking about him and can't wait for him to get home you know talk dirty and 9x out of 10 he comes home ready to go even if he's tired from working. I've also set the kids nap times around then so we don't have to worry about them. Good Luck!

    Answer by AshleyBolton89 at 5:55 PM on May. 19, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.