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Some of it may be my fault. Im terrified of bugs, mainly bees and spiders.. so he is too. And i make sure he knows that he can get very hurt if he does dangerous things. but im just thinking of his safety! i never meant to let it get this far! now my son is scared of everything.. or at least complains about a lot. i left him with the babysitter today while i was at work. she said he complained about the vaccuum being too loud, was scared to go down the slide because it was gonna shock him, was scared of her cats because they might bite him, this car is too loud, he hates this food and that food. UGH, im raising my son to be a scared, always complaining little boy! PLEASE help me fix this :(

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 1:28 AM on May. 20, 2011 in Preschoolers (3-4)

Answers (8)
  • Take him to try new things, encourage him to try again when he messes up, and let him be uncomfortable once in a while. I actually have the opposite problem, and while part of it is probably just personality, the other part of it is because we regularly encourage our kids to do stuff like climbing the climbing wall, trying out the tall slide, getting dirty, etc.

    Answer by thalassa at 1:36 AM on May. 20, 2011

  • show him your not afraid by going up and killing a spider with a brave face and no fear or screams or squeals.

    Answer by xxhazeldovexx at 2:34 AM on May. 20, 2011

  • Show him to be careful not afraid. Accidents happen we just have to try again. My son was fine with spiders with me. He would step on them in bare feet. After I went back to work he spent a lot more time with his dad (who screams like a lil girl when he sees a spider) he turned into a lil chicken! I had to be the man of the house when it came to the spiders but I teased them both a bit about it. And now there my little knights in armor again. I think all men/boys want to be protectors from the start the just need to be needed. Not saying boys can't be scared or show emotion by no means. I think they just need to be led by example. Were there role models they can't help but want to be like us.

    Answer by Ashleycash at 12:11 PM on May. 20, 2011

  • I found myself making my DD scared of frogs (as I am) -- so wouldn't you know it, 2 damned frogs (small tree frogs) SOMEHOW got into our house -- I FORCED myself (in front of her) to VERY calmly catch those gross little hopping slimy monsters in a butterfly net and GENTLY put them outside. She was telling me "good mommy -- be gentle." LOL -- I really wanted to sling them in a trash can somewhere! Let him see you calmly interacting with all those things you mentioned and he will re-learn to not be scared!

    Answer by BaileysMom476 at 12:46 PM on May. 20, 2011

  • actually sounds like a true disoder. Not poor parenting or a mom who passed on fears. Get him an eval by an occupational therapist who specializes in children and sensory issues. My bet is on you are not a bad mom but have achild who has been very misunderstood. He may jave a true medical reason for his discomfort.

    Answer by frogdawg at 11:03 PM on May. 21, 2011

  • Actually I would bet my paycheck on it....and I make a very nice paycheck. Go get that poor kid real help and don't blame him or you.

    Answer by frogdawg at 11:05 PM on May. 21, 2011

  • I guess my kid must have the same disorder... in the past week he has started freaking out whenever he sees a bee (or a shadow, or the wind blowing in trees, or hears a loud noise outside, or sees a bug on the window screen...). He freaks out when I drive down an unfamiliar road. I don't know what to do. To try to help with the bees I have read him the book "bee and me" I have explained that bees live outside and that they do sting- but usually don't come near people. when we are outside bumble bees are all over our back yard. When one comes near him I say (cheerily and enthusiastically) how brave he is and how cool it is that he is near the bee while it is getting pollen from flowers. I am scared of bees and I am nervous about me and my kids getting stung- but I just act like everything is great and we will be fine. Its better than being stuck inside all summer:) good luck!!

    Answer by bloomsr at 12:14 AM on May. 22, 2011

  • also, I really don't think your kid has a disorder- it seems like it is a phase that 3-4 year olds go through. Probably has to do with control and an increased realization of the environment around them.

    Answer by bloomsr at 12:15 AM on May. 22, 2011

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