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Does this make me a mean person?

My cousin called me today at work, asking if I could give him a ride home. I've done it before, he usually meets me at a park right off the freeway so i don't have to go so far out of my way because we live 40 miles out of the city. It gets a little annoying, it's not like he is in the city to work, he is at his girlfriend's house, she doesn't have a car either. These are two people in their late 30's...anyhoo. So after he calls me today, he calls me back to say he isn't going to make to the park on time and starts telling me where his gf's house is. Now to get there, I would have to go east, when home is west. Traffic is always killer when I get off work at 5 and I told SO and the kids we could go to the free movie tonight at the community center which starts at 6, which means I have to rush home anyway. I asked if he could hop the bus a little closer then the spot he was asking, then he gets this hurt voice and says "Never mind, I'll just hitchhike." I tell him he can't do that, I'll pick him up and he says "no thanks anyway my dear." So now I feel guilty! Am I being mean?

Answer Question
 
nmmama09

Asked by nmmama09 at 6:35 PM on May. 20, 2011 in Relationships

Level 19 (7,466 Credits)
Answers (14)
  • no
    butterflyblue19

    Answer by butterflyblue19 at 6:37 PM on May. 20, 2011

  • Nope. he is a grown man. He needs to take care of himself instead of mooching off of you.
    Jademom07

    Answer by Jademom07 at 6:38 PM on May. 20, 2011

  • Poor planning on his part, let it go. You and you're family first.
    sweet11-12

    Answer by sweet11-12 at 6:38 PM on May. 20, 2011

  • nope...he got there why cant he find away back other then you?
    happymama02

    Answer by happymama02 at 6:49 PM on May. 20, 2011

  • Wow- he's a grown man, hon! And you had plans with your family- do you really want to disappoint your kids? I wouldn't want to! Don't feel bad. You gotta be a mommy first :)
    lovingmy4babies

    Answer by lovingmy4babies at 7:00 PM on May. 20, 2011

  • No. He's a grown man. He called you, on a Friday, to ask you last minute for a ride. Then he calls back to ask you to go even more out of your way to get him. On a Friday night. Which would, even though he didn't actually know, make you cancel plans you had with your family. And now he is pulling the guilt trip. You are not mean, he's being a baby.
    Raine2001

    Answer by Raine2001 at 7:04 PM on May. 20, 2011

  • This is the rule I follow... Unless it is an emergency or one time thing, if he wants to use you on a somewhat regular basis he needs to let you know that he's going to be needing your services or ask you if you can help at least a day ahead, this may also require some gas money depending on how far I would be driving. Otherwise I'm sorry but the answers no, it's too last minute and you already have plans.
    BUTTERCUP777

    Answer by BUTTERCUP777 at 7:06 PM on May. 20, 2011

  • You are a saint for agreeing to drive him, ever. You do not owe him rides every time he needs to get his needs met at his GF's house.

    Sorry, I have an enabled moocher in the family, so I am a bit angry about these types.

    Don't let him guilt you. Ultimately, it is his problem that he does not work and cannot pay for transportation.
    ImaginationMama

    Answer by ImaginationMama at 7:08 PM on May. 20, 2011

  • Fuget aboout em lol
    SMITxsM2

    Answer by SMITxsM2 at 7:10 PM on May. 20, 2011

  • Oh, and you're not mean but he is manipulative, don't fall for it!
    BUTTERCUP777

    Answer by BUTTERCUP777 at 7:10 PM on May. 20, 2011

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