Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Why do so many men not appreciate the work and care involved in raising children?

Soon to be ex husband behaves as if working part time evenings after he would get home from work 3 nights a week for 13 years on end so our children did not have to go to daycare, is nothing to be appreciative of. Now since our kids are in school and we have two households, I work 48 hours a week - 9:00 to 3pm 4 days a week and 7pm til 3pm 3 nights a week so that I am there for the children in the morning to make breakfast pack lunches and drive them to school, and there in the afternoon to pick them up make snacks and bring them to their various activities, and 4 nights a week be able to have dinner and spend time with them. He has them 3 nights a week (the ones that I work) and when it suits him on the weekends and feels that I do not deserve half the income tax credit we recieved back when we filed as married in 2010. He says since he earns more than me ( in excess of 120,000 a year) and pays far more taxes than me, and paid, in 2009, the 300 bucks I owed to the government. I can barely make ends meet in this expensive town I was forced to live in 16 years ago. And he feels he is entitled to our joint taxes. I told him, you cannot pay a nanny on what he gives me each month!

Answer Question

Asked by coronado25 at 7:16 PM on May. 20, 2011 in Relationships

Level 4 (37 Credits)
Answers (5)
  • oh hoho..mine certainly does appreciate it..he's completely lost when i leave town or just go away for 4hrs!

    Answer by dullscissors at 7:18 PM on May. 20, 2011

  • I thought it was standard in a divorce agreement for one spouse to claim the kids on ODD years and the other spouse to claim the kids on EVEN years...

    Answer by GoodyBrook at 7:18 PM on May. 20, 2011

  • My question reads "why do so many men...". Yours being not one of those many, I wonder why you answered? That aside, when I attempted to work days one time 15 years ago, my husband showed up at work with the baby (dressed ridiculously with a soggy nappy) and said, "I just can't do this." It was really very funny and I was happy to stay at home until I began working nights to make ends meet.
    But, that has been forgotten by my husband now--who feels I am not entitled to anything after 18 years of marriage.

    Comment by coronado25 (original poster) at 7:57 PM on May. 20, 2011

  • Take it to a lawyer. I really don't care for guys like that :(

    Answer by hopeandglory53 at 9:15 PM on May. 20, 2011

  • I don't know why men are that way. My dh has made the comment "I'd love to sit home" and then caught himself. I said I'd love to just sit home too. I think the grass is always greener scenario is why, our jobs seem so much easier when you aren't doing it. I'd get a lawyer on the tax money, you're entitled to half if it was a joint return.

    Answer by Austinsmom35 at 1:10 PM on May. 23, 2011

Join CafeMom now to contribute your answer and become part of our community. It's free and takes just a minute.