Neither. If a child is doing something they know they shouldn't, but they are chosing to do it anyway, you need to think about why they are making that choice!! Considering things from the child's perspective, and looking at their motives, can make a world of difference in your parenting, and you can become a better parent with better behaved kids and have a closer relationship with them. Parenting effectively is NOT about control. It's about nurturing, loving, guiding, and connecting emotionally and psychologically with your child. Sometimes a child will "misbehave" (ie. make a choice we would prefer they didn't make) in order to get attention because they are bored or lonely or feeling isolated. Don't punish that. Kids are needy, they require a lot of time, attention and love, and they will not grow into healthy happy adults unless they get a lot of your time and loving attention.
at 10:20 PM on May. 20, 2011