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Is it wrong for me to get involved when my daughter gets dumped by a boy?

 
starbritegirl

Asked by starbritegirl at 2:51 AM on May. 21, 2011 in Teens (13-17)

Level 2 (7 Credits)
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Answers (10)
  • What is your definition of get involved?
    Talk to your daughter - sure. Help her heal - sure. Talk to the boy or the boy's family - no.
    And if she tells you to go away - go away, for a while. Let her heal on her own time and in her own way as long as it isn't destructive.
    twinsplus2more

    Answer by twinsplus2more at 9:13 AM on May. 21, 2011

  • I just went through this with my dd who is going to be 18 in June. The guy she had been in love with since she was 12, lost her virginity to, and thought that they would be together forever...Well, we had my son's funeral, and my niece through marriage was there, and he ended up with her. It went on for three weeks, until people started asking who the girl that he was walking around town with was. It was really hard for me to keep my mouth shut, but I told her that the decision was hers, and that we loved her no matter what. I did point out that she is beautiful, and that she could do a lot better, and deserved a lot better. So she told him to get out, and told him to go find Beth, that she wasn;t going to deal with it anymore. I was so proud of her, because I knew how it broke her heart! First she lost her big brother, and then she lost him! She's still reeling from it, but at least she has her self respect!
    MamaAlice54

    Answer by MamaAlice54 at 3:09 AM on May. 21, 2011

  • I wouldn't get too involved, I would just give her love and support that every teen girl needs when she gets her heart broken. Just let her know that it was his mistake to leave her and that someone better will come along!
    soon2bmmy

    Answer by soon2bmmy at 3:11 AM on May. 21, 2011

  • why NOT get involved?? That's your CHILD! Be there for her, share your experiences & encourage her.
    shareleann

    Answer by shareleann at 6:07 AM on May. 21, 2011

  • I get involved with my daughter,just be their for her and I say just remind her that one day someone is gonna sweep her off her little feet and fall madly in love and never let her go.
    MarGeee

    Answer by MarGeee at 11:15 AM on May. 21, 2011

  • I wouldn't push her to talk to you, let her know you are there if she wants to talk. I wouldn't say anything bad about the boy because they could end up back together. I wouldn't say anything to the boy.
    tazdvl

    Answer by tazdvl at 11:33 AM on May. 21, 2011

  • Follow her lead. Tell her you are there for her if she needs you and then let it go.
    cleanaturalady

    Answer by cleanaturalady at 6:50 PM on May. 21, 2011

  • When you say get invovled what do you mean? If you mean to be there for her then YES! You totally should. However, you shouldn't go to him and say anything, it won't help. As much as it sucks, we can't live our kids lives for them, all we can do is be there to help pick up the pieces when it all falls apart.
    Peajewel

    Answer by Peajewel at 6:15 AM on May. 21, 2011

  • Thanks everyone for your imput. She is 16 and he waited till she left yesterday for a band trip out of town to TEXT her and tell her. HOW immature!!! She is so heart broken.....
    starbritegirl

    Comment by starbritegirl (original poster) at 1:13 PM on May. 21, 2011

  • Just be there and be supportive. Not much else you can do. Telling her "it's ok, boys are dumb" and all that won't make her feel better really, but you can empathize and say "yes, it does hurt when you go through a breakup" and "it hurts, but it will get better even though it does hurt now."
    SherriPie

    Answer by SherriPie at 1:16 PM on May. 22, 2011

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