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6 Bumps

My husband called me an asshole.

My husband came in and said... "You smoked cigarettes" I said.. "No I didnt bc you always hide them.. : (literally he does) He said "no I didnt theyre in here like they always are ASSHOLE!" He realized it upset me, then I told him "Oh thanks, thank you" He says "I was joking with you" I then told him to leave me alone....

We have had A LOT of problems... One BIG problem... he has a short temper and is constantly snapping and calling me names... He PROMISED he would change.. and like always.. he changes for a few days, then back to his same old ways...

He wants to act like I did something wrong, so he storms out and goes off to the gym...

Did I do something wrong??? Im sooo sick of this... I told him one more time... and I was done... he did it again... now what??

Answer Question

Asked by Anonymous at 8:15 PM on May. 21, 2011 in Relationships

Answers (13)
  • I never called my first husband asshole (although he deserved it, and we were married 13 years), and I've never called my current husband any names - we've been married for almost 7. It's disrespectful and downright mean.

    Answer by Scuba at 8:21 PM on May. 21, 2011

  • Are you really done? Are you sick of getting treated like crap, are you sick of not being in a loving caring relationship with a guy who deserves you. I'd take a few days apart, let him see that you weren't joking, and take those few days and reflect on you.

    Answer by BabyBugsmama at 8:24 PM on May. 21, 2011

  • If you told him one more time and you'd be done, then you need to be done. If you don't follow thru on your threat he will assume he can say and do anything he wants. You need to be done with him.

    Answer by meooma at 8:34 PM on May. 21, 2011

  • He shouldn't have called you a name, but were you sneaking smokes behind his back?

    Answer by ItsMe89 at 8:36 PM on May. 21, 2011

  • asshole is a weird term to call a woman

    Answer by staciandababy at 8:39 PM on May. 21, 2011

  • Looks like you are done if you are a woman of your word. If not, I would begin to treat him the way he treats you. tell him you are only joking with him when he complains.

    Answer by bcauseimthemom at 8:53 PM on May. 21, 2011

  • You should follow through on your word. Maybe see if he'll seek counseling if he really wants to save the marriage.

    Answer by soontobestep198 at 8:59 PM on May. 21, 2011

  • If you told him this was the last time and then do nothing, it will open the door for the insults and degradation to continue and get worse. He needsto realize that it s wrong to treat you this way. If it wasme, I would at least leave for a few days like the other lady suggested, and think about what you really want and need. If he wants you back, he needs to be more respectful and act like an adult, not a child throwing a tantrum.

    Answer by IamErin-K. at 9:14 PM on May. 21, 2011

  • If you say you're done yet do nothing, your husband will treat you like "the girl who cried wolf"; meaning he'll know you'll take the name calling instead of leaving him. Therefore he wont respect you, & will continue to "jokingly" call you names because you've shown him you dont respect yourself enough to remove your self from this kind of abuse. Personally? My response would be: "Takes an asshole to know an asshole". Oh yeah--then tell him you're joking........

    Answer by RubyinPA at 10:20 PM on May. 21, 2011

  • sounds like it is a rollercoaster ride and you need to decide when to get off of it and if my dh ever called me anything it would not be good and he would learn real fast not to ever say it again and I'm not saying that i would be a bully and be mean but I cook him big dinners and make his lunches and give him what he likes so if he messes up he gets PB&J until he understands he screwed up. It does work, lol

    Answer by wheresthewayout at 11:25 PM on May. 21, 2011

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