My ex and I divorced almost 3 years ago. We have 3 children together. He has recently gotten remarried. His new wife quit work when they got engaged, 5 months ago and has 2 children of her own and is 6 months pregnant with twins. I get about $1937 a month for child support and $575 for alimony. My ex makes about $7100 a month (actually, more then that, he got a big raise but as me and the children have all we need and I know about his growing new family, I didn't go back to court to have the child support increased.) I also got half of what was in his retirement when we divorced. With that plus my half of the equity in our home, I was able to purchase a home that I now own free that clear (though, it is much smaller then what we had, it's nice). I am going to school for my teaching degree since I was a stay at home mom our whole marriage (15 years, before we had our own children, my ex had 2 children from a previous marriage who I had 4 days a week, they are now grown). So now me and my children are stable, I am able to pay all the bills with the child support and alimony. I will be done school in a couple years, about halfway done. My ex called me the other day to ask me for a reduction in child support and he wants to stop paying alimony altogether. In total, he is asking to pay $800 less a month! He said that it's because he is now having to support 4 more children. His new wife has no plans to work (and remember, she has 2 children from her previous marriage and apparently, she gets almost nothing in child support). So now they will have to sell their home and move somewhere smaller (you mean like I had too with OUR children????). I told him that I would speak to my attorney. I asked my attorney if my ex would be able to get a reduction in child support because of his 2 new children and 2 step children, my attorney said, in some states yes, but NOT in this one. My attorney worked out how much more he should be paying me based on his new raise and he should be paying close to $200 more a month. I think my not going after that is more then generous and understanding. So I feel that I am going to call my ex and tell him while I am NOT going to settle for less, I won't go after more at his current pay. It made me mad when he said "why can't you go get a job"? Why couldn't his wife continue to work or even plan to go back to work after the babies are a few months old? Why should I go to work so she doesn't have too? Why should my youngest child go to daycare (she doesn't now but would have to if I went to work), yet her children are too good for that? I just feel like that is part of being the second wife and having children with a man who already has children. Does this sound fair? Feel free to ask any other questions, I am posting anonymously because I am talking very in depth about my finances.
Asked by Anonymous at 10:17 AM on May. 22, 2011 in Parenting Debate
Answer by autodidact at 12:58 PM on May. 23, 2011
Answer by shivasgirl at 10:23 AM on May. 22, 2011
Answer by Anonymous at 10:34 AM on May. 22, 2011
Answer by itsmesteph11 at 10:27 AM on May. 22, 2011
Answer by samurai_chica at 10:34 AM on May. 22, 2011
Answer by gemgem at 10:22 AM on May. 22, 2011
Answer by Anonymous at 10:30 AM on May. 22, 2011
Answer by pinkdragon36 at 10:21 AM on May. 22, 2011
Answer by Anonymous at 10:28 AM on May. 22, 2011
Answer by miss_lisa at 10:34 AM on May. 22, 2011
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